Y2Ten...

For some reason i was laying in my bed the other night while it was as still as could be (considering it's Christmas time) throughout our home and my mind began wandering toward the fact that in just a few days it will be January 1st of 2010....

About that same time, i begin to think about what i was doing about ten years ago in December 1999, right before the arrival of January 1st of the year 2000...


okay, okay i admit it, i was a a little bit unsure about the whole "Y2K" thing.... and while i had not built a bunker in the back yard that was stocked with survivalist supplies, i did wonder what would happen...


i do know one thing, unlike December of 1999, i sensed the presence of God in my life and in our home the other night as i lay there in that dark bedroom... i could hear the radio in my youngest son's bedroom play some song that made a powerful statement about the importance of faith in Christ... i recognized how God had made it possible for my daughter and second oldest son to connect with other students their own respective ages who will be lifelong friends.... i felt pride swell in my heart as my oldest son, against all sorts of odds, makes his way through a university atmosphere learning what it means to truly live the faith he claims to possess...

And for what seemed to be the millionth time since we have been married to each other... i imagined (because i could not see remember? It was night time...) what my wife's incredible smile looked like when she is awake....

i don't remember much about about December 1999 but i do hope the image i just recalled stays with me for many more years to come...

Happy New Year.

Ho, Ho, Ho....

Well, here we go... Christmas time in Chicago!

There's nothing like it! Perhaps the thing i like about Christmas here is that it's filled with all sorts of memories...

Probably my most favorite memory is growing up in Park Forest and going to Blackhawk Junior High and Rich East High School. Even though i was pretty much a big cry-baby (that's another story for another blog)... i managed to survive the experience! The Christmas season was when we would have concerts and basketball games... i was better at the singing than the playing basketball by far!

i can still recall the smell of popcorn in the halls at East during the basketball season... people shuffling in from the cold, snowy, wet parking lot. The trees by the campus lagoon standing in the middle of a blanket of snow. i can remember thinking... "Man, i feel sorry for Roscoe (one of our janitors)... he is going to have to clean up this wet mess!"
The Christmas concerts with the Singing Rockets (that's what our upper-class Choral group was called) were always a great event as well. Mr. Ulreich would wear his tux during the sacred song portion of the program and would actually let us sing these great songs about the coming of Christ. The fun part was after the program when we would just get a chance as students to hang out...

Which frankly is what i look forward to most with my own family... just hanging out on Christmas eve... there will be home-made hot chocolate, new pajamas from Old Navy and probably "The Christmas Story", you remember....
Ralphie: No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
Santa: You'll shoot your eye out, kid... Ho, Ho... Ho.

What About This World....

A really good friend of mine had a significant event occur in his life this week… it was (is) one of those events that causes me to stop a moment, take a pretty long and introspective look (i am really getting accomplished at that as i get older). What struck me the most about this particular event in the life of my friend is this (i’m also stealing the following thought from another friend)…

This world sucks….

Profound huh?

i know that is probably more than a bit strong for some of you reading this but it pretty much sums up life in a world that is ravaged by the effects of humans deciding to do things “my way”.

i would really like to say something else about the condition of the world but frankly this world sucks says it all. i would love to have something deeply profound and thought provoking to say other than that but this week, that is as good as it gets.

Thing is, i wonder if i am too tied to life in this world. That is another thought that came to me this week when i got the news about my friend. i was amazed at how angry i was that this happened to him. i found myself thinking… “Well, that is just not fair… that should have never happened to him”…

Oh sure, i spend a decent amount of time helping people understand that this life and world are temporary but when it gets right down to it, it takes things like what happened this week to remind me that i also am way too wrapped up in this life and not appropriately focused on the life to come. i am not talking about becoming “too heavenly minded and no earthly good”… rather i am talking about rediscovering in my own life the anticipation of looking forward to the day when life as it was originally intended to be experienced becomes the ultimate reality…

That's For You Get.....

Because he's the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now.... Lt. James Gordon (The Dark Night)

i think this line from the most recent Batman film sums up much of life... at least for me....

When i was a kid, my cousin Chris was a constant source of funny stuff... He was cute, always had something to say and was fast! In particular i recall one time when he had been teased by one of my other relatives, he got very angry and resentful and was looking for a way to exact his revenge. It didn't take long and when the person who had made fun of him finally got their comeuppance, my cousins' comment, instead of "That's what you get....", was "That's for you get!". And just like in the movie the Dark Knight, i believe we often get just what we deserve...

From our national political scene to life in our own churches, workplaces, neighborhoods and homes... i truly believe that there is a spiritual principle at work in situations when we get what we deserve... that's because i do believe our actions have consequences.... Most of us don't like to think about consequences, they tend to put a bit of a "damper" on our pursuit of the things we want... or at least the things we think we want.

For a few years i believed that the best thing that could happen to me and to my family was for me to to co-lead a church and instead of determining a way to make the most of the situation i was in at that time, seeking to be content and appreciative... i convinced myself that i really needed to make this change and frankly i got exactly what i deserved. And it wasn't all that great...

The whole idea of consequences tends to make us nervous... we'd like to think that we can do whatever we want to do and what happens after that is really irrelevant. However, human history shows that getting what we deserve often serves us well. If we are wise, we will allow consequences to reshape and refine us... making us into he people that we needed to be in the first place.

Hmmm... seems to me, now that i really think about, it my cousin Chris was on to something when he would snap back..."That's for you get!"

Long Overdue....

Amazing to think that exactly three months ago today was the last time i wrote in my blog. There have been a lot of things that have happened in those three months....

• Ruthie and i spent a night out in Ottawa, IL at "The River Loft"... just the two of us... it was very cool (thanks Mary)!
• Spent some time in Savannah, GA at an event for XP's at Savannah Christian Church... the event was worth it if only because i had dinner at "The Lady & Sons" (it is so NOT over rated)!
• Had an opportunity to travel to Louisville, KY for a convention, made a bunch of new connections and an invitation to submit a chapter for a book on diversity in the local church!
• Performed a wedding for a young man that i have known for almost twenty years... (Zach was really little when we first met and i was much younger)
• Watched my oldest son pack-up his room in anticipation of leaving for college, who for the first time in 15 years will not be "bunking" with his younger brother...
• Spoke with small group leaders about how to become great storytellers...
• Celebrated the birthday of the hottest woman i know just this week (this, of course, is the same person i spent some time with out in Ottawa, IL)....
• Ate Aurelio's Pizza at 1959 prices (their 50th anniversary).... a "Fiesta" size pepperoni & cheese pizza....$6.95!!!
  

With summer coming to an end there is a tinge of sadness but still, i am excited about the fall! There are so many new opportunities and challenges to look forward to in the next few months...

Yep, this was overdue and it's time to get back into the swing of things... i can hardly wait!

A Classy Kid & Classy Friends....

Well this past weekend we celebrated in a major way! Our Open House for Josiah's graduation from High School was more than a blast, it was humbling....



Our house was filled to overflowing as our friends and family gathered to congratulate this newest member of the class of 2009! Probably the thing that caught me off guard the most is all the people who were at this party from the various "eras" of our lives...

• From my High school days.... folks who in fact pretty much kept me on the straight and narrow path like Earl & Pat... who have known Josiah since he was about two years old!

• From our college days.... friends like Kim & Wade... friends who have modeled what it means to persevere through the curves that are part of this thing called life... again friends who have known Josiah since he was a baby...

• From our first ministry back here in the US... Sue Haynes who has loved on my kids since we first met her about 15 years ago...

• Friends like Ted & Jane... who have encouraged us and our children in ways too numerous to count... even when we felt like dorky parents their encouragement has carried us for miles....

• Marc & Beckie, who just about a year ago prepared to send their oldest off into the world... just like we will in a few months...

• Carol, Wally & Brian who for some strange reason continue to love our family unconditionally...

• Amado, Joy, Rick, Mindy, Rob, Dave, Mary, Jen, Kyle, Chris, Lisa, Jonatan, Cinthia, William, Tracie, Karla, Linda, Mont and Christie... people who are way more than "fellow staff" members and spouses... they are our family...

• My spiritual leaders who continue to hold my family up with their prayers... John, Harris & Tom...
  

• Our small group at Westbrook, who are attempting to make this journey with us and keep encouraging us every step of the way....

• There are a multitude of names i did not mention and for that i apologize... it's not that i didn't want to... there are just so many of you who have been a such a blessing to our family... thank you so very much!

Yep, it was a very special night for a very special young man, with folks who have been and continue to be very special people.... and i am not just saying that because he is my son...

i'm saying it because it's very true.

Multi-Ethnic Church Planting....

Last week i had the opportunity to participate in the National New Church Conference, otherwise known as Exponential... it was great! Under the banner of the Mosaix Global Network, my Senior pastor Mont Mitchell, along with Mosaic of Central Arkansas' Mark DeYMaz put together a teaching track on Multi-Ethnic Church planting.

The story behind our connection with Mark and Mosaix Global Network is pretty cool...
Our family over the past few years has traveled to different parts of the country and stayed in various resorts that are part of a network we first found out about from very good friends in Indianapolis. Over the past several years we have traveled to resorts in Florida, the Poconos, Fox Valley in Illinois and a few years back for the first time ever, we traveled to central Arkansas. We were thrilled to go to Arkansas because we knew we would be able to "sneak" school in on our kids, without them even knowing it! The part of Arkansas we were in was fairly close to Little Rock. In addition to being the capital of Arkansas, Little Rock was "ground zero" of the Civil Rights struggle in our nation back in the late 1950's. It was here that the Little Rock Nine entered the previously whites only Central High School on September 27th, 1957. We took some time to visit the school and tour the museum across the street that chronicled the history of the school and the role it played in the events of the fall of 1957.

As we were leaving the city of Little Rock that day to head back to our resort, we turned down Colonel Glenn road.... (ok, i'll admit it i had no idea where i was) and looking to my right, i recognized a sign advertising a church that i recalled seeing online. i had spent some time before we left on vacation looking for churches committed to multi-ethnic ministry and suddenly there was Mosaic of Central Arkansas! After freaking my family out due to the 90 degree turn at 40 miles per hour into their parking lot, i had the opportunity to meet Mark and several of his staff.

That ultimately led to a connection with Mosaix and a growing network of churches committed to multi-ethnic ministry! It has been a great connection and i am thrilled about the future of multi-ethnic ministry not just in our nation but around the world in the coming years!

A New Era....

A few weeks ago i wrote about A Long And Winding Road.... and now it seems that we have taken another turn (a good one) on that road....

Just this past week, Josiah, Ruthie and i (along with his future roommate Tyler Mitchell and his parents Mont & Christie) took a trip to Grand Rapids, Michigan for a Family Orientation Day at Cornerstone University and it was a great trip! Josiah had committed to attend Cornerstone University, sight unseen! Ask Josiah and the he will tell you that his deep admiration for their president, Dr. Joe Stowell, didn't hurt his decision at all either!

i must admit my own disappointment however... i mean seriously.... why Michigan? Florida... Southern Cali, Arizona.... now that would have been nice... but Michigan?!? i know they have Cherries and Blueberries and stuff like that but they also have a whole lot of SNOW!

i on the other hand told Ruthie that at one point in the day, i was sitting in the chapel service while the student led worship was taking place and let my mind begin to wander.... i wondered about how incredible it was that we were sitting on this campus, preparing to release our son into this environment. An environment he would have never considered as a viable possibility as little as five years ago.... as a matter of fact five years ago our family was in a place that could have seriously hindered his decision to become part of a university like this one.

So here we are on the edge of a new era... i recall with crystal clarity standing in Jon's driveway as we prepared to drive over six hours to our college of choice in Missouri. As Jon got ready to leave the last person he saw at the door was his dad. With the car packed to the "gills" he said goodbye to his dad and gave him kiss on the lips. i recall distinctly thinking to myself... one day I want to have a son that i can send off to college with a kiss on the lips... i just didn't think it would come so soon.

A Suzy-What?

It's been a while since i have written anything here.... no real reason other than a short hiatus that was long overdue... i was talking with someone just last night who asked me how the blogging was coming along.... someone else spoke up and said it's hard to keep up with it... i remarked that i had plenty to say... i just wasn't ready to get it on the blog!

Quick question... how many of you out there know the difference between a contract and a covenant? Go ahead... raise your hands... to be honest I hadn't really thought about it too much at least not in the last 25 years...

The last time i learned about what a contract is... probably around 1986... i learned about the Suzerain-Vassel treaty of the late bronze age (nice huh?!?). See the deal is, the "suzerain" is the king... the one who promises to do the "stuff" and the vassel... well the vassel is the person (or persons) who isn't the king. Basically the treaty or the contract is for the benefit of the king (of course that's who has the power) and not the vassel. All of that to say contracts have a way of working out well for one of the parties involved and disastrous for the other. There is built-in animosity and potential distrust.

Covenants on the other hand are about a relationship. The desire in a covenant relationship is to work toward understanding... not the contractual "take/take" or what-can-I-get-out-of-this-relationship but rather a "give/give", how can we "work-this-thing-out? By the way, the covenant relationship is far more satisfying and fulfilling. This is actually the way God chooses to deal with us, the fact that He does this says volumes about who He is.

So here is my question... How do most of us live out our closest relationships... with our friends or our children or with our spouses? My suspicion is that if we were really honest, too many of us think we are the suzerain and everyone else is a vassel.

A little transparency....

Gotta be honest... i have been seriously considering calling the blogging thing quits.... i haven't written in a few weeks just to see if i would get any emails or inquiries about the blog...

If you don't know it, there is a way i can check and see what the "traffic" is like in terms of people reading my blog and quite frankly the numbers are way less than impressive... not that numbers are the most important thing but they do mean something and what the numbers mean right now is that i need to make some changes or stop writing all together.

Interestingly enough though, i had someone say to me just this past week..."and don't think that no one is reading your blog, i read it every week..."

At any rate, i am excited about having the opportunity last week to take about 50 people through the Inventory of Spiritual Emotional Health from the book "The Emotionally Healthy Church"... it was interesting as we spent time discussing the results of the inventory and the issue of the "sore spot"... many people were deeply moved and many of us realized that we have some "work" to do in order to go from humans doing to simply human beings.
The adventure never ends!

What Did You Just Say?!?

Are we really "cowards"?

Is it truly that "everyone" is cowardly?

Is it fatigue...

Is it frustration...

Is it disgust...

Is it confusion...

Is it denial...

Is it anger...

Is it shame...

Well, it's 2009 and it seems in many ways we aren't much further along, in terms of having difference making discussions than we were in 1969...

Please notice, i didn't say we weren't further along in terms of legal rights or equal access, much of that has been addressed (rightly so) through state and federal legislatures and our court system...

But there is something still "missing".....

But then again, maybe the attorney general has a point....

What do you think?

American difference makers....

The month of February is Black History month. i seriously doubt that Carter G. Woodson (the man who is responsible for launching the initiative) would have ever thought the day would come when the occupant of the White House would be a black man!
A few weeks ago i had the opportunity to speak at a community celebration about a dream that one of the most prominent leaders in the Black community had for our nation many years ago... Dr. Martin Luther King often spoke of the "beloved community"... let me encourage you to take some time today as you read this blog (that is assuming you are still reading), search that term on the Internet.... beloved community.
Right now, i am in Indianapolis and the African-American community here has a rich and vibrant history as well. Madame C.J. Walker is noted by many to be the first female African-American millionaire and her story is very, very cool!
While the trophy was given to the most outstanding college football player every year beginning in 1935, there was one group of athletes who up until 1961 were excluded from Heisman consideration. Ernie "The Express" Davis led Syracuse University to their only national championship and became the first African-American to win the Heisman in 1961.
There are so many others who have contributed not just to Black History but American history can i encourage you to take some time, go to your local library, check out the Internet... wrap your heart and mind around the contributions that so many African-Americans have made and continue to make to our nation!

A Long And Winding Road....

Can i tell you a pretty cool story?

My son Josiah, who is about to graduate from his last year of high school, has been taught at home by his Mom every since he was about three years old... we have never been interested in making statements about the state of the public school system in our country or anything like that. My mother was a public school teacher in New York City for well over twenty years! i loved the schools that i attended growing up and as a matter of fact, i have friends to this day that i attended school with!

We actually started teaching Josiah at home because Ruthie had originally intended to become a public school teacher... She's a very talented and creative writer and for several years she regularly contributed curriculum to several large children's curriculum publishers. So for her, teaching our children at home was, in many ways, the fulfillment of a dream.

Several years into teaching first Josiah, then our next oldest son Jonah, our daughter Hannah and now Levi, we observed that Josiah was having some difficulty reading. After some assessments we were able to do on our own, we determined that Josiah seemed to have slight dyslexia... Dyslexia is a learning disability that causes the brain to process information differently and often manifest itself in that individuals may have difficulty with written language in particular with reading and writing... and as you can imagine it can be extremely frustrating to both the student and his teachers.... now magnify that by about a bizillion times in a homeschooling setting!

Josiah and his mom however persevered and even to this day continue to do the hard work of not allowing this disability to keep either one of them in check! Now add to this the fact that a foregone conclusion is that one day when you're done with high school the obvious "next step" would be college... for Josiah (and maybe even his mom) knots in the stomach accompanied that thought! The key would be taking the ACT test... Josiah studied extra hard... even though he had taken other standardized test in school this one was different... he took the test, half believing that double digits would be a miracle...

Fast forward to the past two weeks... Josiah received his test score from the ACT which when submitted to the college he wanted to attend.... along with his current academic record and other funds made available... qualified him to receive scholarship funds which will underwrite his college tuition by at least 50% for the next four years!
i'd say between Josiah and his Mom they should both be very, very proud!
i am... of both of them.

Digging deep...

Just this past week, i finished a fascinating book. As a matter of fact, the author of the book put into writing something that for many years i had wondered about but just didn't know how to articulate. Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Pete Scazzero is a very, very insightful book. Scazzero's thesis is that it is impossible to separate emotional health from spiritual maturity.
The whole concept of being a person who is seeking to grow spiritually takes a turn on its' head if this premise is accepted...

I have often wondered what is the deal?!? Over the years i have met and dealt with...

• People who seem rather normal...

• People who seem to be rather lucid...

• People who have expressed a sincere desire to grow into totally devoted followers of Jesus... and for some inexplicable reason, things seem to for no reason, to go terribly wrong!

Many of us say we want to change, or we want to be different, some people even talk about undergoing a "transformation" but it would seem that this author is right... there is no way to go forward and grow until we take a trip backwards and deal with some "stuff".... for a lot of us we won't make that trip backwards until as Scazzero says in his book the pain of staying where we are becomes unbearable... that is a point with which I can easily identify with.

It's interesting to me... i think a lot of us who are so wrapped up in "doing", we have little to no clue what it means to simply "be"... i know i'm guilty of it too! Always looking for the next great thing to do or accomplish (we often say or think) "for God"... when the reality of it all is, that we are truly looking to do is salve some horrific message we have come to mistakenly believe is true about us from our past.

The great thing is, freedom and authentic change (inside AND out) can be accomplished but it will require digging deep... anything less is a waste of time and effort. This is scary stuff but i think if people would just take the chance, lives would be radically transformed...

Heart Shaping events...

Wow, it seems like forever ago when i sat down to write for my blog! But we had a great Christmas and a fantastic New Year!
i really wanted to get back and write about a class I had the opportunity to take with Lincoln Christian Seminary this week that was actually held at the Chiara Center just outside of Springfield, IL. It was a weeks worth of intense "inner work".
Now i know that some of you may read that last sentence and think... "oh great, do we have to get all introspective and stuff?!?" Well yeah... we do.... it's good for you!


The class was titled, "Shaping The Heart of The Leader" and was unlike any class i ever took in my undergrad studies at Lincoln. But here is the basic premise in a nutshell.... "What are the key events from your life that have shaped your heart?" When you stop to think about it... that seems like a pretty weak question to build an week long intensive seminary class around but when you have the opportunity to "go vertical" (meaning dig deep) as our instructor invited us to do that question can in an instant cause your life to literally flash before your eyes. Let me share one such story. i have shared this before but it's power never fades...

Mr. Wroughton was a teacher and coach in my Jr. High school Blackhawk Jr. High and was intimately interested in his students. Most people would have looked at me, a pre-teen, fatherless black kid and thought… “no way that kid is going to make it…” The truth is I probably would have believed them too had Mr. Wroughton not made a difference with one simple act of kindness…

Everyday at the end of basketball tryouts and after “showers” (remember this is Junior High) were taken we could find out who was invited back the next day by looking at the list posted on Mr. Wroughton's office door. I made it through all three days of tryouts until Friday… the list was posted for those invited back for Monday to be on the team! Guess what…my name was not on list. I cried all the way home… it just so happened that the basketball coach drove by me as I walked home and could see me crying.

On Monday, that same coach asked me to stick around for the first practice of the basketball team. At the end of the practice, he gathered everyone around himself for a moment. He asked if anyone had noticed that I was in practice even though I had not made the final cut on Friday. He went on to explain that I was asked to stick around because, he continued, that after our last day of tryouts he had been driving home and drove past me. He then told this group of pre-teen, pubescent, Jr. High boys that he’d seen me crying as I walked home from the tryouts that day. The response was predictable, the snickering and giggling seemed to last forever.

Mr. Wroughton then followed that up with a statement something like this… “I asked Robby (Pause) to come to practice today and I want him to be on this team because any guy who wants so badly to be a part of this team that he would cry because he wasn’t, I figure we can’t be without”

That was a definitely a heart shaping moment... it changed me forever. How about your heart shaping event? I'd love to hear about it!