17.7.08

Bullies...


i'll never forget Dave Nardi...

He was a new kid, pretty big for his age but word was he ended up at Rich East because he had been expelled from Bloom Trail... and let me tell you... if you got expelled from Bloom Trail... you had to be a head case! The rumor was that he got caught dealing and somehow worked out some sort of deal to avoid going to "juvie" (juvenile detention or young offender jail).

Anyway, i was minding my own business one day during my second year of high school and the next thing i knew one of the football coaches was busting Dave Nardi's chops over something... exactly what it was i still don't know to this day but from that point on i was Nardi's target. i found out later that he accused me of being the "narc" that got him in trouble and i think the fact that i was simply in the room when it happened was enough for him to conclude that i was the one that turned him in.

Our high school boys locker room was on the second level above the gym bleachers and was basically a series of caged in rooms with lockers. It resembled a labyrinth and could be difficult to get out of at times. One day after football practice i was running a bit late leaving the locker room, but unbeknown to me one of Nardi's toadies was shadowing me as i got ready to leave... being on the football team at the time it was understandable that i might be taking longer to leave but when one of the coaches showed up and found Nardi's "lookout" man, a series of questions directed at him ensued. With no idea of what was going on, i pushed pass them both and left for home.

The next day that same coach pulled me aside and told me i needed to be careful because Nardi's plan the previous day had been thwarted. Nardi's plan had been to get me cornered in one of the locker rooms upstairs and along with his little henchman beat me senseless. This would be payback for my getting him in trouble several months previous.

For the next several weeks, every single day, i walked home a different way or doubled back toward the high school just to make sure he never knew where i lived. I remember looking over my shoulders hoping i would never see his ugly mug. That was not a fun couple of months.

Dave Nardi was a bully, the worst kind... a sneaky bully. The kind of person who creates a scheme to inflict harm on others just to make themselves feel better with a certain stealth. Sometimes we run into bullies even in adulthood. People who speak loudly for the purposes of intimidation or maybe use silence to keep you guessing what they want. Sometimes adult bullies have a considerable amount of control over our very livelihoods. At other times we may not have to see them very often but when we do, we find ourselves flinching at their every word.

Can i leave you with an encouraging word?

Most bullies will only stop bullying you, when you tell them, "Enough is enough!". It may be hard and it may be scary but stand face to face with who ever is trying to bully you and tell them to beat it, your days of being pushed around are over!

That's one thing the Dave Nardi's of the world completely understand.

2 comments:

dave said...

Your blog made me think of a kid in high school who was a bit of a bully too. Not quite to the extent that Dave Nardi was, but he used to give me a hard time, threatening to beat me up. And he very well could have – he was a year older and much bigger, and was crazy enough too if he was in the mood.

Anyway, one day as he was giving me a hard time, I looked up at him and said, “I’m not afraid of you.” He laughed and said, “Dude, I’m going to beat the____ out of you!” I said, “I know you can beat me up, but I’m not afraid of you.”

It was completely out of character for me to say anything like that, especially in a confrontational position. Plus, the truth is that I was totally afraid of him. He didn’t say anything after that – just snickered. And never gave me a hard time again. I guess it took the wind out of his sails a bit.

Unknown said...

Rob,

Love your stories about Rich East, but really dislike bullies.

I never had any in Park Forest, but when I moved to Calumet City, I had my own Dave.

Thanks for sharing,
Bran

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