Speaking of kids.....

Can i talk about my kids for a minute?

i had intended to talk about something else this week but instead i need to talk about some very, very special people.

More than once over the past many years i have eagerly desired that my kids would love me... i think they know how much i love them... i am always telling them that i do but beyond that, i often try to figure out why in the world they love me back!?! i mean think about it, for most of us, this parenting thing is in many ways a total shot in the dark right? i think i can safely say that the majority of us who are doing the parenting thing are doing it pretty much by the proverbial seat of our pants... right?!?

You know what i mean... i wonder why these kids love me back when most of the time if i am honest i think i treat them like they are little lab animals... i'm trying out what i think is best or what i think is right with little to no guarantee that these guys are going to come out of the other side of what may turn out to be an at least 18 or 19 year experiment with each of them (there are four, that are here with us, we have two others that we look forward to seeing at another time and in another place) and be normal.

Please understand i am not advocating that only licensed people be pre-approved for parenting or anything like that... if that had been the case there are probably a lot of us who wouldn't be here today! But i know that my children with regularity have to put up with a lot of stuff that they shouldn't have to. My irritability and stubbornness can make for a home that is not so much fun from time to time. Yet they call out to me all the time to get my nod of approval or my attention and most of the time they pretty much love to "show off" for daddy.

Sometimes i worry about their resilience. i mean do they just forget the hard times? Do they simply not recall the scary times? What do their young and still developing minds do with the questions that even Mom and Dad can't really answer?

All i know is that my kids amaze me. They are incredibly forgiving and amazingly patient. They of course, do the normal stuff that kids do... arguing with one another, forget important details, misplace their own socks and shoes but in the grand scheme of things they continue to amaze me with their ability to continue to love me even when i am sure i have been a jerk toward them!

It is becoming more obvious to me that as my children grow older they will probably require less and less from me ( i hope... they are great kids but they are expensive sometimes!) but i think the one thing they will probably always require is to know is that daddy is proud of them... man, they really are great kids....