Lifegiving Conversations....

That Girl Beat Me Up! (or Every Little Boys' Nightmare Come True!)

2010-03-10T16:25:00.008-06:00

For as long as i can remember, i used to get beat up. It was not unusual for me to come home almost everyday from school crying or with a torn up shirt, a bloody nose or busted lip... now don't get me wrong, i am not the kind of person who goes looking for fisticuffs but somehow watching that Daniels kid get beat up or being the one to beat him up was something akin to a national past time back in the day...

Now to make it a bit more shaming (and please don't read anything sexist into this... it just is, what it is ok?) more often than not, i was getting my head handed to me by not just any other kid but in particular, i seemed to be the kid that the girls liked to pick on and beat up. To this day i still do not know why but somehow i always manged to tick Helga or Hildegarde off and then i was told that after school, it was "on".

You want to talk about humiliating... can't get much worse than knowing everyday not only are you going to end up in a fight you'll lose (because you don't know how to fight) but add to that the fact that it's in all likelihood going to be a girl who takes you down...

So why share this chapter of my life fit for the wall of shame?

Because of Sam... actually her name was Samantha but she told me to call her Sam. It amazes me that after all these years i remember her name...

For some reason Sam liked me and decided that i was going to be her boyfriend and of course i agreed... she was cute, she had braids and a pretty smile and plus if i had said no... i think she would have beat me up too. One day though Sam found out that Sandra was going to beat me up after school... not sure why Sandra wanted to be me up... must have just been her turn up to "bat". But Sam came out of school that day stood between me and Sandra and told Sandra that before she could be me up she would have to beat Sam up... come to think of it, that was the last time that year anyone threatened me... Sam made sure i was ok.

Not sure whatever happened to Sandra or Sam.... i imagine Sam probably competed under a pseudonym on American Gladiators or something... Sandra however...who knows?

One thing is for sure, that one year with Sam changed me, not because i became this great fighter but because Sam in her own way helped me see myself as worthy of being defended. i am still not sure what she saw in the quiet little boy with a thick New York accent but as i have said elsewhere i still remember Sam's name. And that says a lot more than anything else....

Where Did The Month Go?

2010-02-25T14:44:00.006-06:00

Hmmm... sort of interesting that Black History month is about over and in many ways, there seemed to be pretty much a collective cultural yawn about it all. Perhaps the assumption that more would be made of this month of remembrance and recognition because of the presence in the White House of our nation's first Chief Executive of color, was mistaken on my part.
There are some who i suspect would say..."Well see we're past the obsessive need to see people as a color...".

i certainly hope not.

i looked to see if there might be special presentations on television or in newspapers and there didn't seem to be too much... maybe special gatherings in the local community i live in but nothing. i begin to wonder why.

The fact is, the color of a person's skin should be celebrated and recognized as a gift. Being able to celebrate a cultural heritage and share stories with those around us who perhaps have a different shade of skin color really should enrich our lives. Dr. King never said skin color didn't matter... he did however talk a lot about the content of one's character... which i believe is definitely shaped by the stories of our lives. I can't help but wonder now that our nation has openly elected a person of color to the Presidency, will there be an even louder cry to "stop making a 'big deal' out of a person's racial or ethnic background..."

i do hope that not only would we make it a point of learning and continuing to celebrate the contribution of Black Americans to this nation but that we would learn to recognize the unique contributions of other Americans from different ethnic backgrounds as well. To me this is what makes our nation so incredible... so many different people, making a such significant difference... such an incredible place to live!

The Greatest....

2010-02-17T14:35:00.012-06:00

When i was kid, some of the greatest sports icons of all time were at the height of their careers, Arthur Ashe, Muhammad Ali, Hank Aaron, Willie Mays, Bill Russell, Walt Frazier, Jim Brown, Wilma Rudolph to name a few. As a child i had no idea what these people had to go through to get to the level of professional sports they had attained.

All i knew was that they were fun to watch! Everyone on my street wanted to hit like Hammerin' Hank or "float like a butterfly and sting like a bee"... We would talk for days on end about what this pro athlete had done or (since I lived in New York City as a kid) who was seen at what places around the city! It was pretty exciting to see men and women who looked like me doing these incredible things.

i wasn't a very good athlete as a little kid but i knew what was good game when i saw it. My mom on the other hand was a bit of a sports nut. Looking back on it now it's funny to me that she used to talk all the time about players like Bob Gibson and Roberto Clemente or she would tell me about the starting line up for the New York Mets or whether or not the Jets were going to be any good that year!

My mom wasn't ever truly a "franchise" or team fan but she was always talking to me about the great players in all sports and more often that not she was telling me about the great players who were black and helping me understand the sacrifices that these people were making in order that the door to professional sports would never be slammed shut in the face of future black athletes.

Perhaps that is not a big deal to you... maybe in light of what professional sports seems to have become today you feel a bit jaded toward these people but to a wide eyed little boy, looking for people to look up to and admire it made a pretty big difference.

I Could Do That!!!

2010-02-03T09:31:00.016-06:00

It may be the middle of winter, but it is also Black History Month! No matter what you think, you have to admit, it's very cool to take a few weeks and focus on the unique contributions of Black Americans... so many who not only were and are famous, but people who fulfilled their purpose!

Growing up in the late 60's and early 70's, i think the thing that stands out the most to me are the black actors and actresses that took to the "silver screen"! It was a "new thing" to have so many Black people playing the main roles... the strong, take-no-trash man or woman who takes charge and saves the day! When i was a kid, seeing these men and women in these roles had a profound effect on me. For as strange as it might seem Sidney Poitier, Harry Belafonte, Ruby Dee, Ossie Davis, Pam Grier, Billy Dee Williams, Cicely Tyson, Jim Brown and many others helped me see that the sky was the limit! It was possible (if i wanted) to do the same thing they were doing... i mean, maybe not literally as a cowboy in the Old West like in Buck and the Preacher but... you know what i mean!

Of course many of the movies these pioneers were starring in had a sub-plot involving the insidiousness of bigotry or racism. But the really cool thing is that no matter what other obstacles their characters encountered they typically found a way to overcome those obstacles and teach strong lessons about doing what was right or for the greater good.

Not to mention, these people were really, really good at their craft but even in the midst of all that they never took themselves out of the reach of people who live normal, everyday, 9 to5 lives. They may have taken political or moral positions on issues but they tried to back up what they "preached" with how they lived. Not perfectly they might admit but it
made you want to be like them and that was (and is) essentially a good thing.

But at its' core, isn't that really what Black History is all about? Wanting to be like the people who have made a difference? Having an impact that last beyond the last time we draw breath here on earth? Fame is a flash in the pan... but fulfilling a purpose last for eternity...

Are We Still In America?!?

2010-01-21T15:14:00.008-06:00

Went to Phoenix last week... leaving Midwest, dead of winter, below freezing temperatures for short sleeve weather was pretty nice! The only thing that would have made it better would have been to have my family be able to make the trip with me... but this time they couldn't...

i had the opportunity to hang out for a few days with a bunch of great people at the XP Summit. Folks from all over the country who serve their church staff in a capacity similar to mine... it was a great experience!

But i must admit the part of my little excursion out west that disturbed me and at the same time filled me with excitement me was a trip to Arizona Reservation Ministries. Having the opportunity to find a little bit more about what God is doing in Arizona was encouraging and challenging. I want to thank Dale & Diana Lawrence for allowing me to spend time with them, finding out exactly what the conditions on the ground are for the Apache people...

Let me just say i was both awed and humbled by what Diane and Jean (thanks so much!) drove me around to show me that day... with over 2 million acres of land, the San Carlos Apache reservation (total population of roughly 12,000) sits on the edge of Globe, Arizona. My mind was filled with questions as i saw up close and personal life on this particular reservation. i found myself thinking..."Are we still in America?!?" Especially given the following facts about life here....

77% unemployment
Up to 20 or more people sharing one single-family home
Many of the girls are having multiple children before they turn 18 years old
Children begin abusing alcohol while still in grade school
Growing resurgence of gang activity
High instances of alcoholism and rampant methamphetamine use (80 "meth" babies were born here in 2008)

But in the midst of this God is working through the team at ARM, their ministry partners and supporters and many of the Apache themselves to bring hope to the Nation of the San Carlos Apache! Westbrook sent a group out west to work with ARM last summer and is planning on doing so again this summer.

The darkness cannot hold back the light, we are excited about strengthening our partnership with ARM, we pray they are excited as well!

Wow... a ton of Tiger!

2010-01-07T12:34:00.008-06:00

i have not had much to say but have found myself wondering over the last several weeks... what's the big deal about Tiger Woods? i must admit to being a little shocked by what seems to be a generally across-the-board negative reaction to his, shall we say, indiscretions?!? Now perhaps i'd have a different take if he was married to my daughter, sister or friend... but seriously i wonder why is there such an overwhelmingly negative reaction?

Is it driven by the shock of seeing the world's number one athlete using multiple women as nothing more than objects with which to feed his own voracious sexual desires?
Is it driven by deep seated resentment of a ultra-wealthy guy who seemingly threw all common-sense to the wind and behaved in sexually irresponsible way?
Is it driven by a disgust with a husband completely disregarding his own promise to remain faithful to the mother of his children?
Is it driven by the image of a black man who, as it seems now, has a fairly narrow (and perhaps distorted) view of what "beauty" truly is?
Is it driven by jealously, the thought "Gee, I wish I could do that... but I'd never be able to get away with it like he did/has/does?"

Not that it makes it right or ok but the fact is Tiger Woods has not done anything that many, many other people haven't already done... and that is, try to fill up the whole in our souls with garbage that will ultimately destroy us...

Technically, psychologically maybe there are other words, phrases and explanations assigned to what has happened with and what he is accused of having done but here is the heart of the matter for me... a family has been (again) forever impacted by a father's poor choices... it doesn't have to end this way however... but for now we wait to see what will ultimately happen.

Personally, my hope is, if i get to revisit this topic in the future the story will be very different and filled with promise.

Y2Ten...

2009-12-29T15:48:00.009-06:00

For some reason i was laying in my bed the other night while it was as still as could be (considering it's Christmas time) throughout our home and my mind began wandering toward the fact that in just a few days it will be January 1st of 2010....

About that same time, i begin to think about what i was doing about ten years ago in December 1999, right before the arrival of January 1st of the year 2000...

okay, okay i admit it, i was a a little bit unsure about the whole "Y2K" thing.... and while i had not built a bunker in the back yard that was stocked with survivalist supplies, i did wonder what would happen...

i do know one thing, unlike December of 1999, i sensed the presence of God in my life and in our home the other night as i lay there in that dark bedroom... i could hear the radio in my youngest son's bedroom play some song that made a powerful statement about the importance of faith in Christ... i recognized how God had made it possible for my daughter and second oldest son to connect with other students their own respective ages who will be lifelong friends.... i felt pride swell in my heart as my oldest son, against all sorts of odds, makes his way through a university atmosphere learning what it means to truly live the faith he claims to possess...

And for what seemed to be the millionth time since we have been married to each other... i imagined (because i could not see remember? It was night time...) what my wife's incredible smile looked like when she is awake....

i don't remember much about about December 1999 but i do hope the image i just recalled stays with me for many more years to come...

Happy New Year.

Ho, Ho, Ho....

2009-12-18T10:29:00.010-06:00

Well, here we go... Christmas time in Chicago!

There's nothing like it! Perhaps the thing i like about Christmas here is that it's filled with all sorts of memories...

Probably my most favorite memory is growing up in Park Forest and going to Blackhawk Junior High and Rich East High School. Even though i was pretty much a big cry-baby (that's another story for another blog)... i managed to survive the experience! The Christmas season was when we would have concerts and basketball games... i was better at the singing than the playing basketball by far!

i can still recall the smell of popcorn in the halls at East during the basketball season... people shuffling in from the cold, snowy, wet parking lot. The trees by the campus lagoon standing in the middle of a blanket of snow. i can remember thinking... "Man, i feel sorry for Roscoe (one of our janitors)... he is going to have to clean up this wet mess!"
The Christmas concerts with the Singing Rockets (that's what our upper-class Choral group was called) were always a great event as well. Mr. Ulreich would wear his tux during the sacred song portion of the program and would actually let us sing these great songs about the coming of Christ. The fun part was after the program when we would just get a chance as students to hang out...

Which frankly is what i look forward to most with my own family... just hanging out on Christmas eve... there will be home-made hot chocolate, new pajamas from Old Navy and probably "The Christmas Story", you remember....
Ralphie: No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
Santa: You'll shoot your eye out, kid... Ho, Ho... Ho.

What About This World....

2009-10-08T07:55:00.011-06:00

A really good friend of mine had a significant event occur in his life this week… it was (is) one of those events that causes me to stop a moment, take a pretty long and introspective look (i am really getting accomplished at that as i get older). What struck me the most about this particular event in the life of my friend is this (i’m also stealing the following thought from another friend)…

This world sucks….

Profound huh?

i know that is probably more than a bit strong for some of you reading this but it pretty much sums up life in a world that is ravaged by the effects of humans deciding to do things “my way”.

i would really like to say something else about the condition of the world but frankly this world sucks says it all. i would love to have something deeply profound and thought provoking to say other than that but this week, that is as good as it gets.

Thing is, i wonder if i am too tied to life in this world. That is another thought that came to me this week when i got the news about my friend. i was amazed at how angry i was that this happened to him. i found myself thinking… “Well, that is just not fair… that should have never happened to him”…

Oh sure, i spend a decent amount of time helping people understand that this life and world are temporary but when it gets right down to it, it takes things like what happened this week to remind me that i also am way too wrapped up in this life and not appropriately focused on the life to come. i am not talking about becoming “too heavenly minded and no earthly good”… rather i am talking about rediscovering in my own life the anticipation of looking forward to the day when life as it was originally intended to be experienced becomes the ultimate reality…

That's For You Get.....

2009-08-27T04:46:00.008-06:00

Because he's the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now.... Lt. James Gordon (The Dark Night)

i think this line from the most recent Batman film sums up much of life... at least for me....

When i was a kid, my cousin Chris was a constant source of funny stuff... He was cute, always had something to say and was fast! In particular i recall one time when he had been teased by one of my other relatives, he got very angry and resentful and was looking for a way to exact his revenge. It didn't take long and when the person who had made fun of him finally got their comeuppance, my cousins' comment, instead of "That's what you get....", was "That's for you get!". And just like in the movie the Dark Knight, i believe we often get just what we deserve...

From our national political scene to life in our own churches, workplaces, neighborhoods and homes... i truly believe that there is a spiritual principle at work in situations when we get what we deserve... that's because i do believe our actions have consequences.... Most of us don't like to think about consequences, they tend to put a bit of a "damper" on our pursuit of the things we want... or at least the things we think we want.

For a few years i believed that the best thing that could happen to me and to my family was for me to to co-lead a church and instead of determining a way to make the most of the situation i was in at that time, seeking to be content and appreciative... i convinced myself that i really needed to make this change and frankly i got exactly what i deserved. And it wasn't all that great...

The whole idea of consequences tends to make us nervous... we'd like to think that we can do whatever we want to do and what happens after that is really irrelevant. However, human history shows that getting what we deserve often serves us well. If we are wise, we will allow consequences to reshape and refine us... making us into he people that we needed to be in the first place.

Hmmm... seems to me, now that i really think about, it my cousin Chris was on to something when he would snap back..."That's for you get!"

Long Overdue....

2009-08-21T14:04:00.005-06:00

Amazing to think that exactly three months ago today was the last time i wrote in my blog. There have been a lot of things that have happened in those three months....

Ruthie and i spent a night out in Ottawa, IL at "The River Loft"... just the two of us... it was very cool (thanks Mary)!
Spent some time in Savannah, GA at an event for XP's at Savannah Christian Church... the event was worth it if only because i had dinner at "The Lady & Sons" (it is so NOT over rated)!
Had an opportunity to travel to Louisville, KY for a convention, made a bunch of new connections and an invitation to submit a chapter for a book on diversity in the local church!
Performed a wedding for a young man that i have known for almost twenty years... (Zach was really little when we first met and i was much younger)
Watched my oldest son pack-up his room in anticipation of leaving for college, who for the first time in 15 years will not be "bunking" with his younger brother...
Spoke with small group leaders about how to become great storytellers...
Celebrated the birthday of the hottest woman i know just this week (this, of course, is the same person i spent some time with out in Ottawa, IL)....
Ate Aurelio's Pizza at 1959 prices (their 50th anniversary).... a "Fiesta" size pepperoni & cheese pizza....$6.95!!!

With summer coming to an end there is a tinge of sadness but still, i am excited about the fall! There are so many new opportunities and challenges to look forward to in the next few months...

Yep, this was overdue and it's time to get back into the swing of things... i can hardly wait!

A Classy Kid & Classy Friends....

2009-05-20T18:22:00.013-06:00

Well this past weekend we celebrated in a major way! Our Open House for Josiah's graduation from High School was more than a blast, it was humbling....

Our house was filled to overflowing as our friends and family gathered to congratulate this newest member of the class of 2009! Probably the thing that caught me off guard the most is all the people who were at this party from the various "eras" of our lives...

From my High school days.... folks who in fact pretty much kept me on the straight and narrow path like Earl & Pat... who have known Josiah since he was about two years old!

From our college days.... friends like Kim & Wade... friends who have modeled what it means to persevere through the curves that are part of this thing called life... again friends who have known Josiah since he was a baby...

From our first ministry back here in the US... Sue Haynes who has loved on my kids since we first met her about 15 years ago...

Friends like Ted & Jane... who have encouraged us and our children in ways too numerous to count... even when we felt like dorky parents their encouragement has carried us for miles....

Marc & Beckie, who just about a year ago prepared to send their oldest off into the world... just like we will in a few months...

Carol, Wally & Brian who for some strange reason continue to love our family unconditionally...

Amado, Joy, Rick, Mindy, Rob, Dave, Mary, Jen, Kyle, Chris, Lisa, Jonatan, Cinthia, William, Tracie, Karla, Linda, Mont and Christie... people who are way more than "fellow staff" members and spouses... they are our family...

My spiritual leaders who continue to hold my family up with their prayers... John, Harris & Tom...

Our small group at Westbrook, who are attempting to make this journey with us and keep encouraging us every step of the way....

There are a multitude of names i did not mention and for that i apologize... it's not that i didn't want to... there are just so many of you who have been a such a blessing to our family... thank you so very much!

Yep, it was a very special night for a very special young man, with folks who have been and continue to be very special people.... and i am not just saying that because he is my son...

i'm saying it because it's very true.

Multi-Ethnic Church Planting....

2009-04-30T05:23:00.015-06:00

Last week i had the opportunity to participate in the National New Church Conference, otherwise known as Exponential... it was great! Under the banner of the Mosaix Global Network, my Senior pastor Mont Mitchell, along with Mosaic of Central Arkansas' Mark DeYMaz put together a teaching track on Multi-Ethnic Church planting.

The story behind our connection with Mark and Mosaix Global Network is pretty cool...
Our family over the past few years has traveled to different parts of the country and stayed in various resorts that are part of a network we first found out about from very good friends in Indianapolis. Over the past several years we have traveled to resorts in Florida, the Poconos, Fox Valley in Illinois and a few years back for the first time ever, we traveled to central Arkansas. We were thrilled to go to Arkansas because we knew we would be able to "sneak" school in on our kids, without them even knowing it! The part of Arkansas we were in was fairly close to Little Rock. In addition to being the capital of Arkansas, Little Rock was "ground zero" of the Civil Rights struggle in our nation back in the late 1950's. It was here that the Little Rock Nine entered the previously whites only Central High School on September 27th, 1957. We took some time to visit the school and tour the museum across the street that chronicled the history of the school and the role it played in the events of the fall of 1957.

As we were leaving the city of Little Rock that day to head back to our resort, we turned down Colonel Glenn road.... (ok, i'll admit it i had no idea where i was) and looking to my right, i recognized a sign advertising a church that i recalled seeing online. i had spent some time before we left on vacation looking for churches committed to multi-ethnic ministry and suddenly there was Mosaic of Central Arkansas! After freaking my family out due to the 90 degree turn at 40 miles per hour into their parking lot, i had the opportunity to meet Mark and several of his staff.

That ultimately led to a connection with Mosaix and a growing network of churches committed to multi-ethnic ministry! It has been a great connection and i am thrilled about the future of multi-ethnic ministry not just in our nation but around the world in the coming years!

A New Era....

2009-04-20T10:06:00.008-06:00

A few weeks ago i wrote about A Long And Winding Road.... and now it seems that we have taken another turn (a good one) on that road....

Just this past week, Josiah, Ruthie and i (along with his future roommate Tyler Mitchell and his parents Mont & Christie) took a trip to Grand Rapids, Michigan for a Family Orientation Day at Cornerstone University and it was a great trip! Josiah had committed to attend Cornerstone University, sight unseen! Ask Josiah and the he will tell you that his deep admiration for their president, Dr. Joe Stowell, didn't hurt his decision at all either!

i must admit my own disappointment however... i mean seriously.... why Michigan? Florida... Southern Cali, Arizona.... now that would have been nice... but Michigan?!? i know they have Cherries and Blueberries and stuff like that but they also have a whole lot of SNOW!

i on the other hand told Ruthie that at one point in the day, i was sitting in the chapel service while the student led worship was taking place and let my mind begin to wander.... i wondered about how incredible it was that we were sitting on this campus, preparing to release our son into this environment. An environment he would have never considered as a viable possibility as little as five years ago.... as a matter of fact five years ago our family was in a place that could have seriously hindered his decision to become part of a university like this one.

So here we are on the edge of a new era... i recall with crystal clarity standing in Jon's driveway as we prepared to drive over six hours to our college of choice in Missouri. As Jon got ready to leave the last person he saw at the door was his dad. With the car packed to the "gills" he said goodbye to his dad and gave him kiss on the lips. i recall distinctly thinking to myself... one day I want to have a son that i can send off to college with a kiss on the lips... i just didn't think it would come so soon.

A Suzy-What?

2009-04-03T06:41:00.005-06:00

It's been a while since i have written anything here.... no real reason other than a short hiatus that was long overdue... i was talking with someone just last night who asked me how the blogging was coming along.... someone else spoke up and said it's hard to keep up with it... i remarked that i had plenty to say... i just wasn't ready to get it on the blog!

Quick question... how many of you out there know the difference between a contract and a covenant? Go ahead... raise your hands... to be honest I hadn't really thought about it too much at least not in the last 25 years...

The last time i learned about what a contract is... probably around 1986... i learned about the Suzerain-Vassel treaty of the late bronze age (nice huh?!?). See the deal is, the "suzerain" is the king... the one who promises to do the "stuff" and the vassel... well the vassel is the person (or persons) who isn't the king. Basically the treaty or the contract is for the benefit of the king (of course that's who has the power) and not the vassel. All of that to say contracts have a way of working out well for one of the parties involved and disastrous for the other. There is built-in animosity and potential distrust.

Covenants on the other hand are about a relationship. The desire in a covenant relationship is to work toward understanding... not the contractual "take/take" or what-can-I-get-out-of-this-relationship but rather a "give/give", how can we "work-this-thing-out? By the way, the covenant relationship is far more satisfying and fulfilling. This is actually the way God chooses to deal with us, the fact that He does this says volumes about who He is.

So here is my question... How do most of us live out our closest relationships... with our friends or our children or with our spouses? My suspicion is that if we were really honest, too many of us think we are the suzerain and everyone else is a vassel.

A little transparency....

2009-03-05T23:00:00.004-06:00

Gotta be honest... i have been seriously considering calling the blogging thing quits.... i haven't written in a few weeks just to see if i would get any emails or inquiries about the blog...

If you don't know it, there is a way i can check and see what the "traffic" is like in terms of people reading my blog and quite frankly the numbers are way less than impressive... not that numbers are the most important thing but they do mean something and what the numbers mean right now is that i need to make some changes or stop writing all together.

Interestingly enough though, i had someone say to me just this past week..."and don't think that no one is reading your blog, i read it every week..."

At any rate, i am excited about having the opportunity last week to take about 50 people through the Inventory of Spiritual Emotional Health from the book "The Emotionally Healthy Church"... it was interesting as we spent time discussing the results of the inventory and the issue of the "sore spot"... many people were deeply moved and many of us realized that we have some "work" to do in order to go from humans doing to simply human beings.
The adventure never ends!

What Did You Just Say?!?

2009-02-20T08:11:00.005-06:00

Are we really "cowards"?

Is it truly that "everyone" is cowardly?

Is it fatigue...

Is it frustration...

Is it disgust...

Is it confusion...

Is it denial...

Is it anger...

Is it shame...

Well, it's 2009 and it seems in many ways we aren't much further along, in terms of having difference making discussions than we were in 1969...

Please notice, i didn't say we weren't further along in terms of legal rights or equal access, much of that has been addressed (rightly so) through state and federal legislatures and our court system...

But there is something still "missing".....

But then again, maybe the attorney general has a point....

What do you think?

American difference makers....

2009-02-05T21:38:00.008-06:00

The month of February is Black History month. i seriously doubt that Carter G. Woodson (the man who is responsible for launching the initiative) would have ever thought the day would come when the occupant of the White House would be a black man!
A few weeks ago i had the opportunity to speak at a community celebration about a dream that one of the most prominent leaders in the Black community had for our nation many years ago... Dr. Martin Luther King often spoke of the "beloved community"... let me encourage you to take some time today as you read this blog (that is assuming you are still reading), search that term on the Internet.... beloved community.
Right now, i am in Indianapolis and the African-American community here has a rich and vibrant history as well. Madame C.J. Walker is noted by many to be the first female African-American millionaire and her story is very, very cool!
While the trophy was given to the most outstanding college football player every year beginning in 1935, there was one group of athletes who up until 1961 were excluded from Heisman consideration. Ernie "The Express" Davis led Syracuse University to their only national championship and became the first African-American to win the Heisman in 1961.
There are so many others who have contributed not just to Black History but American history can i encourage you to take some time, go to your local library, check out the Internet... wrap your heart and mind around the contributions that so many African-Americans have made and continue to make to our nation!

A Long And Winding Road....

2009-01-29T16:00:00.008-06:00

Can i tell you a pretty cool story?

My son Josiah, who is about to graduate from his last year of high school, has been taught at home by his Mom every since he was about three years old... we have never been interested in making statements about the state of the public school system in our country or anything like that. My mother was a public school teacher in New York City for well over twenty years! i loved the schools that i attended growing up and as a matter of fact, i have friends to this day that i attended school with!

We actually started teaching Josiah at home because Ruthie had originally intended to become a public school teacher... She's a very talented and creative writer and for several years she regularly contributed curriculum to several large children's curriculum publishers. So for her, teaching our children at home was, in many ways, the fulfillment of a dream.

Several years into teaching first Josiah, then our next oldest son Jonah, our daughter Hannah and now Levi, we observed that Josiah was having some difficulty reading. After some assessments we were able to do on our own, we determined that Josiah seemed to have slight dyslexia... Dyslexia is a learning disability that causes the brain to process information differently and often manifest itself in that individuals may have difficulty with written language in particular with reading and writing... and as you can imagine it can be extremely frustrating to both the student and his teachers.... now magnify that by about a bizillion times in a homeschooling setting!

Josiah and his mom however persevered and even to this day continue to do the hard work of not allowing this disability to keep either one of them in check! Now add to this the fact that a foregone conclusion is that one day when you're done with high school the obvious "next step" would be college... for Josiah (and maybe even his mom) knots in the stomach accompanied that thought! The key would be taking the ACT test... Josiah studied extra hard... even though he had taken other standardized test in school this one was different... he took the test, half believing that double digits would be a miracle...

Fast forward to the past two weeks... Josiah received his test score from the ACT which when submitted to the college he wanted to attend.... along with his current academic record and other funds made available... qualified him to receive scholarship funds which will underwrite his college tuition by at least 50% for the next four years!
i'd say between Josiah and his Mom they should both be very, very proud!
i am... of both of them.

Digging deep...

2009-01-21T14:42:00.004-06:00

Just this past week, i finished a fascinating book. As a matter of fact, the author of the book put into writing something that for many years i had wondered about but just didn't know how to articulate. Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Pete Scazzero is a very, very insightful book. Scazzero's thesis is that it is impossible to separate emotional health from spiritual maturity.
The whole concept of being a person who is seeking to grow spiritually takes a turn on its' head if this premise is accepted...

I have often wondered what is the deal?!? Over the years i have met and dealt with...

People who seem rather normal...

People who seem to be rather lucid...

People who have expressed a sincere desire to grow into totally devoted followers of Jesus... and for some inexplicable reason, things seem to for no reason, to go terribly wrong!

Many of us say we want to change, or we want to be different, some people even talk about undergoing a "transformation" but it would seem that this author is right... there is no way to go forward and grow until we take a trip backwards and deal with some "stuff".... for a lot of us we won't make that trip backwards until as Scazzero says in his book the pain of staying where we are becomes unbearable... that is a point with which I can easily identify with.

It's interesting to me... i think a lot of us who are so wrapped up in "doing", we have little to no clue what it means to simply "be"... i know i'm guilty of it too! Always looking for the next great thing to do or accomplish (we often say or think) "for God"... when the reality of it all is, that we are truly looking to do is salve some horrific message we have come to mistakenly believe is true about us from our past.

The great thing is, freedom and authentic change (inside AND out) can be accomplished but it will require digging deep... anything less is a waste of time and effort. This is scary stuff but i think if people would just take the chance, lives would be radically transformed...

Heart Shaping events...

2009-01-09T17:31:00.009-06:00

Wow, it seems like forever ago when i sat down to write for my blog! But we had a great Christmas and a fantastic New Year!
i really wanted to get back and write about a class I had the opportunity to take with Lincoln Christian Seminary this week that was actually held at the Chiara Center just outside of Springfield, IL. It was a weeks worth of intense "inner work".
Now i know that some of you may read that last sentence and think... "oh great, do we have to get all introspective and stuff?!?" Well yeah... we do.... it's good for you!

The class was titled, "Shaping The Heart of The Leader" and was unlike any class i ever took in my undergrad studies at Lincoln. But here is the basic premise in a nutshell.... "What are the key events from your life that have shaped your heart?" When you stop to think about it... that seems like a pretty weak question to build an week long intensive seminary class around but when you have the opportunity to "go vertical" (meaning dig deep) as our instructor invited us to do that question can in an instant cause your life to literally flash before your eyes. Let me share one such story. i have shared this before but it's power never fades...

Mr. Wroughton was a teacher and coach in my Jr. High school Blackhawk Jr. High and was intimately interested in his students. Most people would have looked at me, a pre-teen, fatherless black kid and thought… “no way that kid is going to make it…” The truth is I probably would have believed them too had Mr. Wroughton not made a difference with one simple act of kindness…

Everyday at the end of basketball tryouts and after “showers” (remember this is Junior High) were taken we could find out who was invited back the next day by looking at the list posted on Mr. Wroughton's office door. I made it through all three days of tryouts until Friday… the list was posted for those invited back for Monday to be on the team! Guess what…my name was not on list. I cried all the way home… it just so happened that the basketball coach drove by me as I walked home and could see me crying.

On Monday, that same coach asked me to stick around for the first practice of the basketball team. At the end of the practice, he gathered everyone around himself for a moment. He asked if anyone had noticed that I was in practice even though I had not made the final cut on Friday. He went on to explain that I was asked to stick around because, he continued, that after our last day of tryouts he had been driving home and drove past me. He then told this group of pre-teen, pubescent, Jr. High boys that he’d seen me crying as I walked home from the tryouts that day. The response was predictable, the snickering and giggling seemed to last forever.

Mr. Wroughton then followed that up with a statement something like this… “I asked Robby (Pause) to come to practice today and I want him to be on this team because any guy who wants so badly to be a part of this team that he would cry because he wasn’t, I figure we can’t be without”

That was a definitely a heart shaping moment... it changed me forever. How about your heart shaping event? I'd love to hear about it!

Will the Real Problem Please Stand Up?

2008-12-19T12:21:00.007-06:00

You'd have to be living under a rock to have missed what is happening with the states' highest executive here in Illinois the last few weeks. Allegedly, we have Governor who is on audio recordings making statements about what he planned to do and what he planned not to do about filling a vacated US Senate seat here in Illinois. Interestingly enough the seat was made vacant because the current President-elect Barak Obama had to resign the seat in order to eventually take the office of President of the United States.

Now maybe i am just way too cynical but frankly, the whole affair is not all that shocking... not from the sense that it's not a big deal but rather this is one case in which i wonder if the electorate of Illinois is ultimately to blame. Not only that, but is it possible that while we (the people, the press and whomever else) wring our hands, call for impeachment and whatever else... our real problem, the real "enemy" so to speak isn't simply graft, greed or politics as usual... maybe the problem is us.

From not voting, to not caring, to not getting connected with our communities, perhaps the issue is us. It would seem that the threshold, the standard to serve in a public role has been lowered so significantly... we have so grown accustomed to excusing poor behavior... especially the poor behavior of those who have been entrusted with positions of leadership both public officials and private individuals... maybe the problem is really us.

It's ridiculous to think that our leaders are going to live up to a standard that the rest of us pretty much ignore as well... so while we point and wag our fingers, while we cluck our tongues in disgust... i wonder if each of us would do well to take a personal integrity and character inventory.

Do i think the governor of our state is as pure as the driven snow (which is piling up pretty fast outside my window right now)...hmmmm probably not. But one thing for sure, the problem is not all with the governor, i truly think the real problem... just maybe us.

My Christmas Story.....

2008-12-12T06:52:00.007-06:00

Our family spent this past Saturday going to out to a Christmas tree farm...looking for the "perfect tree"... The weather did not cooperate... SURPRISE! But we finally did find "the tree"... Is it perfect? Probably not but for our family it will more than do the job! That trip out to Newark, IL got me thinking about Christmas growing up as a kid in the south suburbs of Chicago. i am telling you right now, we did some down right funny stuff at Christmas!

The big thing at our house was....
CHRISTMAS PRESENTS ARE ONLY OPENED ON CHRISTMAS DAY... PERIOD... END OF DISCUSSION... so we figured okay... if that's the rule we'll stay up all night until the stroke of midnight on Christmas eve and then those presents were ours! Er, wrong.... not until about 6 or 7 AM were we allowed to open presents... that was still okay... we'd wait!
The only problem was that as little kids it's real easy to misjudge the impact that trying to stay up for about 24 hours straight might have on your little body! So we (uh i mean, I) came up with a brilliant plan!

Growing up in Park Forest, my mom and her sisters over several years lived together which meant that we often had our cousins living in our home and vice versa. Anyway, one of my favorite cousins when i was a kid was my cousin, Chris. He was about two years younger than me but man he was a funny kid! It just so happened that one Christmas he and i made a decision to stay up together on Christmas eve until we were given the final "all clear" to open the presents. After talking about various methods that we might use i came up with a brilliant (and pretty funny plan). Since caffinated coffee was not on our list of desirable drinks, we settled on something else. In our home there would be various canned goods, (canned the "old-fashoined way... in jars) and often the empty jars were then reused for various things. My idea was that if one of us saw the other one falling asleep we were to take one of the jars and knock the other one on the head with it... what can i say... it worked in the cartoons!
Being the older of the two i didn't care what it took... i wasn't getting bonked on the head and sure enough, Chris began to fall asleep and i got the chance to hit him in the head with a canning jar... i don't know if it helped or not... but he did have a huge knot on his head the next morning which was the source of several angry questions about how we could be so stupid... but we laughed our selves silly about it.

Frankly i don't remember what we got that Christmas but that memory has stayed with me ever since and every single time i think about it, i laugh... i don't know if Chris laughs about it or not but knowing him, probably.

Change happens...

2008-12-05T21:20:00.010-06:00

This past week we celebrated Thanksgiving with my wife's parents and with my Mom and something struck me in what could be a "throw away" moment... it happened in my mind while helping my wife's folks load up their car with all the stuff they brought with them from their home in Indiana and all the new stuff they bought on "black Friday" (i'm thinking with regard to a certain president-elect that day should have taken on an entirely different meaning this year ;)... anyway i had the strangest sensation at that moment... i realized...."Hmm, there may not be a whole lot more family events like this..."

Not because i don't love my in-laws or my Mom or because all we do is fight at family gatherings about religion, politics or this year's embarrassment-to-the-family-family member... but because everyone is getting "older"...

It seems a bit unreal to me that i have one son who is about to head off to college and another one who will probably do the same thing in just a couple more years after his brother... the holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas will be different... it's hard to explain but it is profound.

My family is changing...

My in-laws and my Mom are growing older, Ruthie and i are growing older and get this... my children are well on their way to adulthood.... it's weird. It's one of those things where i think i should be like... happy.

And instead, i became all introspective and things....

Anyway, we had a good time, and tomorrow (Saturday) will go on what could be a last current "family configuration" trip to a tree farm and cut down our own Christmas tree... something Ruthie and i first did when we lived in Calgary... that tree cost us 5 bucks Canadian (in US currency about $2)... oh yeah it was a long time ago... i really need to be more careful about those "throw away" moments...

For Cryin' Outloud!?!?

2008-11-26T13:56:00.004-06:00

Well, several weeks have passed since i last wrote for my blog and if anything i can say for sure is that i never cease to be amazed by people and the things they say out loud....

Perhaps it's the thought that somehow because we think a certain thing or feel a certain way, we believe that people just have to take whatever we dish out to them... that somehow we can say whatever we want to someone or about someone and that should be perfectly fine.

Well it's not... and if there is one thing every single one of us could learn is how to make sure that what ends up coming out of our "pie-hole", first passes through that thing we loosely refer to as a brain...

By now you are probably thinking... sheesh who ticked Rob off this week... well let's just say, it's not so much a person but an apparent mental and emotional immaturity that's reared it's head again this week in sooooooo many ways, too numerous to count!

Some people say whatever they want no matter how mean because they truly believe that it's best to "speak the truth", the main problem with this approach is that you can speak the "truth" all you want but if haven't gained "the right" to speak the "truth" to someone else, in the end you end up sounding like a really, really mean and ill-mannered, boorish lout!

i also think that some people "spew" their "truth" because it's a really convenient way to hide behind their own "stuff"... you know what i mean... some of us are so busy pointing out where everyone else is a "screw up" that we never deal with where we personally are screwy! And listen, there is nothing wrong with being messed up, the problem is when we choose (even when we know better) to stay messed up!

Anyway, all of that to say, civility is not a lost virtue... c'mon folks that's not so hard... is it? Let me know... maybe you have a different take on this whole subject...

Something completely different....

2008-11-05T22:11:00.009-06:00

Wow... the last 24 hours have been truly historical for our nation. And in preparing to write this blog i have gone back and forth with regard with what to say...

See, my problem is that while i strongly disagree with quite a few of the policies that our President-elect Barak Obama indicated he would initiate while on the campaign trail if elected president over the last several months... there is this place inside of me that can't help but...

Wonder what my uncles feel today... since they were actual participants in the Montgomery bus boycott...

Wonder what my aunts and mom feel today... since they grew up in a region of our country that it was once said of "sweltered with the heat of oppression and injustice..."

Wonder what my granddad (if he were still living) would feel today... since he no doubt suffered the repeated indignity of being called "boy" even as a grown man...

Wonder what my great, great grandfather George, the son of a slave would think... since he lived the reality of being considered a non-human, never laying claim to the self evident truths that this nation's citizens were all "endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights"...

If not for any other reason... pondering these things has been (i think) a good thing... my hope is that despite the differences that might continue to divide our nation... we would take a moment to appreciate the historicity of what has just occurred and then collectively "roll up our sleeves" and get back to work doing what God has called each of us to do...

What I Remember....

2008-10-31T06:02:00.005-06:00

A few things but not everything...

The day Ruthie walked into my office down in the basement of the house that had been converted into our church offices and put a bunch of pamphlets on my desk.....

Being the only guy at the shower for you even though all the other guys told me i didn't have to go...

Being interrupted when "Nobungas's Ambition" with Jim Johnson was just getting good....

Wearing my Met's hat and those goofy glasses in our first picture together...

The first time Uncle Jim and Auntie Andrea met you....

When i drove like an idiot to get to the emergency room at Lougheed hospital because of the intersection of a brick fireplace and a lower lip...

Dr. Cho and a pink cast that ultimately became the cast of the World Champion Chicago Bulls...

Coaching (and not very well either i might add) soccer and basketball games with your teams, i don't think we won a single game in either sport but you were a really good player and a good sport....

How excited you were when you found out you would be a big brother.....

The day you told me that you and your little brother decided that you really wanted to get baptized together....

That the poor and disadvantaged, the neglected and forgotten about were the people that you really wanted to work with for the rest of your life....

When you drove what had been up to that time just your Mom's car for the first time...

i remember when it struck me several years ago that soon you would be moving out of our home to start your own life and frankly i was embarrassed that i had let the time slip away from me...

Siah, you have always heard me say i love you but this week i look at you and i am proud of the man that you have become...

Happy birthday bud....

Dad

Bittersweet....

2008-10-24T12:37:00.006-06:00

Well, i have put this off long enough... i sort of hinted at a bittersweet visit to Indianapolis (a great town no matter what you hear otherwise) in a recent Twitter update... but i'd like to explain what i meant.
My family and i lived in Indy for a long time as a matter of fact for all of our children, Indianapolis is really our "home". Don't misunderstand me, we absolutely love being back in the Chicago area but outside of this part of the world, the longest we have ever lived in one place (almost 10 years) was Indy...
i guess the bittersweet part was having an opportunity on Saturday afternoon at a wedding reception (congratulations Christiana & Jason!) to visit with a few people from the church where for seven years i served as one of the pastors... As i fell asleep on Sunday night all i could think of were the missed opportunities to impact the area and the lives of families in that part of Indianapolis. i found myself wondering what in the world we were thinking?

We went into that church and pretty much took a bad situation and made it lots and lots worse. i am complicit because instead of standing up and asking "what in the world are we doing"... i just went along with it all and now it all looks like so much carnage... even as i write this entry i struggle with what i am feeling.... really, really saddened by what i saw this past weekend, but thrilled to be serving where i am serving... very surreal, difficult and embarrassing to explain. Maybe the guilt is just now really catching up to me all these years later or maybe just maybe, i am trying to wrap my mind around how the church in the United States can appear to be so fantastically vibrant on one hand but so incredibly anemic on the other...

Whatever the case i think maybe i have gotten this out of my system, i am thrilled to still be making a difference, my hope is that we will have many more years of being able to touch other people's lives right where we are....

Get the God-Life!

2008-10-16T07:19:00.006-06:00

Last week i didn't get a chance to write on my blog due to a couple of factors (all of which are excuses and as Pastor Amado always says about excuses... well you'd need to ask him about that). Anyway, our staff had an annual planning retreat out near Starved Rock here in Illinois (The picture isn't actually where we stayed... the place we were at was much, much nicer, Thanks Mr. D!). i have to tell you... the fact is, i don't know how we manage to accomplish much of anything, we spend the majority of the time laughing! But that is in the end a very good thing because when we were done with this retreat several issues for our growing ministry were raised, discussed and clarified all of this done in a spirit of excited anticipation!

Now the key is how do we articulate what we believe is God's is calling us to do both as leaders and as a church and how we plan to lead over the next season of ministry. This is one of the most exciting things to me in ministry.... the constant call to stay sensitive to what God is saying...

Many of you who read this blog are folks who are trying to walk what i like to refer to as the "God-life" and that is a challenge and it's even more difficult when you are in a position of influence in a church... because it is often from this vantage point we often see just how "broken" all of us are... but everyday (at least for me) i get a chance to be with people who are committed to the God-life to the point of making significant personal sacrifice, who make me laugh and with whom i am excited to face the future with... all of which makes the God-life a joyful journey!

A very special year....

2008-10-02T14:51:00.015-06:00

What year did a second woman join the United States Supreme Court?

This was the same year that the World Trade Center was attacked for the first time...

Professional Canadian sports team franchises won both the World Series (first for a Canadian team) and the Stanley Cup (24th time for this franchise)....

Despite what former vice-president Al Gore says, this was the year in which the Internet was offered for "free of charge"....

i watched at Greg & Laura Bruno's house as John Paxson scored a three point basket in game six of the NBA finals to give the Chicago Bulls a victory over the Phoenix Suns for their third consecutive NBA championship... the first three-peat in their franchise history!

And on the first Friday of October of that year in a hospital here in the western suburbs a wide-eyed baby boy was born into my family... he would gain legendary status as the one kid who absolutely refused, often at the top of his lungs ;) to stay with anyone other than his dear mother. He was the biggest one at birth and is the biggest one in our house to this day...

Every since he was a baby, he has had a heart as big as Texas... in all these years he has only grown sweeter... he's a good boy and i love him.

Happy Birthday Jonah!

That's $700 billion... with a "B"!

2008-09-25T13:37:00.005-06:00

There has been a lot of talk lately about the financial meltdown taking place in our nation's financial sectors... i am just wondering if the vast majority of folks are really taking notice of the whole deal? A $700 BILLION dollar "bail-out"?!? Whoa!

i don't pretend to have any real great knowledge of the issues that have caused what has happened to happen but i do know this... the continual pointing of fingers is getting pretty darn old. At some point don't we ALL just sort of roll up our sleeves and collectively say let's fix this?!?

i subscribe to a book summary deal, where get regular emails with book summaries attached and one i received not too long ago had this book attached to it, The Post-American World by Zakaria Fareed.

In this book Fareed makes the following astounding but accurate observation...
"The…American political system seems to have lost its ability to create broad coalitions that solve complex issues. The economic dysfunctions…are the consequences of specific government policies." "The American political system has lost the ability for large-scale compromise, and it has lost the ability to accept some pain now for much gain later on." "The United States…has developed a highly dysfunctional politics." "[It] has been captured by money, special interests, a sensationalist media, and ideological attack groups."
Now don't get me wrong there is a ton of other stuff i read in the book summary that i have a few problems with but in this regard... this inability to create "broad coalitions and solve complex issues" within our own nation... should be a "Houston... we have a problem..." wake up call!

What is our problem? Why can't we disagree without getting all nasty and stuff? Or why can't we drop labels and do the right thing, when it's time to do the right thing? i know what many of you are probably thinking... Hey that's what being an American is all about!!! i am not too sure about that but i do know if ever there was a time to try our very level best to be ONE nation... i think this may be it.

Never Forget....

2008-09-11T07:29:00.006-06:00

i have to admit, it always catches me a bit off guard... as i sit here this morning at Starbucks and listen to the reading of the names... i get very emotional... it's not embarrassing it really hurts... a lot.

All i remember is eating a bowl of cereal rather quickly trying to get out of the door for the start of what was a cool, bright, sunny, fall-ish day. By the end of that day almost 200 people would come together in the worship center of where i served in ministry, trying to make sense of what had occurred that morning as i finished a bowl of corn flakes....

Even now, as i hear these names read aloud all i can think of is, in fact, the terror of the day. Maybe that is a sign of weakness or whatever but that day caused me and countless millions to weep tears that still sting our cheeks to this day.

Many people and pundits talked then and still today (seven years later) of how for that brief moment we (the US) had the sympathy of the world and how we ultimately squandered that by prosecuting questionable military actions around the world, blah, blah, blah.... all i know is that looking at the television screen that morning September 11th, 2001, the only thing that mattered was finding out if my mother, brother and sister- in-law who lived and worked in New York City at the time were alright. i didn't want sympathy, i wanted answers.

To be blunt, i am still a bit angry as well, for as upset as i get every single time i think about 9/11, i believe it would do us good as a nation to see the images of the World Trade Center engulfed in smoke and flames, with greater frequency than simply on the "anniversary" date... perhaps we would with greater consistency remember that evil is very real and very deadly.

We Need to Get A Grip!

2008-09-05T13:30:00.011-06:00

Have you ever found yourself wanting to see one particular team lose a game but knowing that everything would still be "okay"even if they ended up winning?

That's how i felt... about the Super Bowl a few years back.

It was an historic day... for the first time in the history of the NFL the two head coaches (best of friends actually) on opposite sides of the field were men of color (black to be exact)! The two teams were both teams that I had an strong fondness for... one team had been the team of my "youth"... i grew up watching Bob Avelini, Bob Thomas, Vince Evans and an assortment of head coaches deal with the never ending frustration of not being able to win in the playoffs! i did however, love the Bears Shufflin' Crew most of all.

The other team on the field that night had earned a very special place in my heart too! i had watched this team go from winning a grand total of six games in the first two years of my living in Indianapolis to a record of 13 and 3 and winning their division under their second year quarterback Peyton Manning.... to their rightly earned spot in THE championship game!

So when "Super Bowl Sunday" arrived i can confidently say it would have been totally alright no matter who won the game that night...

Would the world have ended as we know it? Probably not...

Would football fans from all around the world joined hands and sang a rousing chorus of Kum Bah Ya? In all likelihood uh... No.

Would the game itself have morphed into something completely unrecognizable as NFL football? i doubt it.

My "head" told me which team to cheer for while my "heart" tugged in a different direction...

All the while the game was truly exciting, at the end of the game i knew, i knew... everything would be just fine... my confidence and trust in the things of life were not so wrapped up in this "contest" that i found myself wondering if the fate of the entire universe depended on who won... crazy huh?

Hmmm, i wonder if there are a few things we could learn from my "Super Bowl" experience in light of our current cultural and political climate... i think so... we really need to get a grip!

On the Threshold of History...

2008-08-29T07:23:00.008-06:00

Last night i watched American history being made..... and while i must admit i do not agree with most of the policies of either of the remaining candidates for President of the United States, last night was an evening for the history books. For the first time ever, one of our nation's main political party's placed into nomination for the highest office in the land, the name of a person of color, Barak Obama.

As someone who has a great affection and appreciation (and literally has family "skin" in the game) for all of the struggles of those who have gone before me, those whose blood flowed in the streets of our nation, those who were mauled and attacked by police dogs, those who refused to give up their seats at lunch counter or on a bus, those who toiled in cotton fields but knew the day would come when the bitterness of slavery would be wiped out by the sweetness of freedom... what i witnessed last night in many ways is what is one of the things i consider truly amazing about our nation. This undeniable ability to, even in the face of continuous self condemnation, self-doubt, internal rancor and disagreement do that which seems implausible, impossible and unthinkable.

Please do not misunderstand me, i do not think for one minute that the nomination of Barak Obama as the Democratic candidate for president has made (or will make) our long history and ugly struggle with regard to racial issues and racial justice simply disappear (i do have some ideas on that issue but that is for an other blog) ... but for this one moment we can and should celebrate this victory that is yes symbolic but it is also very, very real.

More Flags.... More Fun?!?

2008-08-21T11:09:00.011-06:00

This past week i didn't write for my blog because my family took a couple of days and went to Six Flags Great America in Gurnee, Illinois. And except for a couple of minor inconveniences, we had a lot of fun! Of course the one who was most excited and couldn't stop talking about going to Great America for about a month leading up to it was our youngest, Levi.

The most interesting thing to me was the difference between Great America and a trip we took as a family a little over a year ago to Disney World... Now don't get me wrong, Great America was a ton of fun, and Disney was simply fantastic but in many ways the differences were pretty startling. For one, Great America is a place that a typical family could basically afford... my understanding is that the prices for Disney were increased this year... while the prices at Great America decreased! As a matter of fact you could purchase Great America tickets on-line for the typical admission price for a child! Which we did! Very nice!

On the other hand the difference in the parks was very obvious as well. While bands of pre-teens and teen-agers freely roamed Great America, unfettered from parents... at Disney, everywhere you looked it was family after family after family. Not only did you see tons and tons of roaming bands of young people at Great America... but the cleanliness factor was stark. Ask anyone in the church office, i am a freak about bathrooms being clean. i am absolutely convinced that the level of cleanliness of the bathrooms in a public place (like Great America or Disneyland or a library, school or a church) can tell you a whooooole lot about a place! And frankly in the bathrooms at Disneyworld the operative word was "spotless"... at Great America... mmmmm, not so much.

It was sort of weird to me... going to Great America brought me back to my High School days here in northern Illinois. Getting a chance to go to Great America was what you lived for! Back then it was a place of wonder and amazement... but i have to admit i sort of accidentally slipped into my evaluation mode and felt a bit sad that it seemed to have lost a lot of that luster in the intervening years...

It was still fun to go, ride the coasters (it was definitely affirmed *again* that i am too old for wooden roller coasters) and watch my kids have a blast! So maybe there slogan is really true... more flags... is more fun!

The New "Evil Empire"?!?

2008-08-07T15:19:00.009-06:00

In a lot of ways it's back to the "bad guys" versus the world....

You remember don't you? i do! i recall vividly sitting in my living room in the winter of 1980 watching the US Olympic hockey team do the unthinkable... beat the dreaded U.S.S.R! It was sweet! i remember jumping up and down as Al Michaels asked..."Do you believe in miracles?!?" The US didn't win the medal that night but did a few days later after defeating Finland.

What about Mary Decker Slaney at the 1984 Olympics in Los Angeles? She was attempting to win her first ever (and best chance for a) gold medal in the 3,000 meter final. That is, until Zola Budd, who many Americans disliked simply because she represented the apartheid (at the time) nation of South Africa, crowded in on her causing her to fall. When Mary Decker fell, her race was over and she was not physically able to finish the race. We were not a happy nation that night.

Then, of course, there were the East German female(?) swimmers. Yikes!

Now as we prepare for these summer games in Beijing... it is quite obvious to me, that in the intervening years since the fall of the Berlin Wall and the eastern bloc nation Soviet satellite nation-states... the world needs a "new bad guy". Ta-da... Hello mainland China!

The news of the repressive, ultra controlling, communist Chinese government has been pretty steady over the past few weeks and days. i have really liked in particular how they have recently indicated that they can deny a visa to whoever they want to (can you say Joey Cheeks?), for whatever reason they want, so shut up!

Or how they have indicated that speaking out about basic human rights is really none of President Bush's business... so he should just shut up too!

i honestly can't remember a time in the last twenty years when i was more attuned to what was happening with the Olympic games than i am with these Games! i guess the thing that really continues to pull me toward paying attention to the Games is my stupification (is that a word?) with just what the communist government of China can do and face little to no "outrage" from the rest of the world. They must have a great PR firm working this Olympics for them.

Well i just hope i don't have to apologize for writing this little blog like several of our Olympic cyclist had to a few days ago for taking precautionary measures with regard to the incredible smog and pollution that fills the air of Beijing.

Dude, this should be fun!

Beyond family, there is the staff....

2008-07-31T20:49:00.003-06:00

For the last week we have welcomed a new staff member to our church staff. It has been great having this newest member of our staff come aboard. Marc has been tasked to serve in a supervisory administrative role with our Children's and Student ministries at Westbrook. The really funny thing is the one person in our office who is really best able to help this guy settle into this position has been called to jury duty and not able to be around to help smooth and guide his transition. The strangest part for me has been that I did most of the interviewing of this position! The ultimate decision to bring him onto our ministry team was not mine to make alone, which was and is a good thing...

Marc made a remark this week that helped me to see that what I have felt and thought of our ministry staff for a very long, long time is true...

Our church staff is different... In a good way.

It's hard to explain but it's a group of people who truly like each other and are always in each others corners. We compliment one another's temperaments and personalities...

We can hold one another accountable and not for one minute question one another's motives or heart. We are fiercely loyal to each other and to the ministry of our church.

It's nice to know that even the newest member of our staff has been able to see that this is true even after being here for just a couple of weeks!

Pretty cool.

Bullies...

2008-07-17T12:08:00.005-06:00

i'll never forget Dave Nardi...

He was a new kid, pretty big for his age but word was he ended up at Rich East because he had been expelled from Bloom Trail... and let me tell you... if you got expelled from Bloom Trail... you had to be a head case! The rumor was that he got caught dealing and somehow worked out some sort of deal to avoid going to "juvie" (juvenile detention or young offender jail).

Anyway, i was minding my own business one day during my second year of high school and the next thing i knew one of the football coaches was busting Dave Nardi's chops over something... exactly what it was i still don't know to this day but from that point on i was Nardi's target. i found out later that he accused me of being the "narc" that got him in trouble and i think the fact that i was simply in the room when it happened was enough for him to conclude that i was the one that turned him in.

Our high school boys locker room was on the second level above the gym bleachers and was basically a series of caged in rooms with lockers. It resembled a labyrinth and could be difficult to get out of at times. One day after football practice i was running a bit late leaving the locker room, but unbeknown to me one of Nardi's toadies was shadowing me as i got ready to leave... being on the football team at the time it was understandable that i might be taking longer to leave but when one of the coaches showed up and found Nardi's "lookout" man, a series of questions directed at him ensued. With no idea of what was going on, i pushed pass them both and left for home.

The next day that same coach pulled me aside and told me i needed to be careful because Nardi's plan the previous day had been thwarted. Nardi's plan had been to get me cornered in one of the locker rooms upstairs and along with his little henchman beat me senseless. This would be payback for my getting him in trouble several months previous.

For the next several weeks, every single day, i walked home a different way or doubled back toward the high school just to make sure he never knew where i lived. I remember looking over my shoulders hoping i would never see his ugly mug. That was not a fun couple of months.

Dave Nardi was a bully, the worst kind... a sneaky bully. The kind of person who creates a scheme to inflict harm on others just to make themselves feel better with a certain stealth. Sometimes we run into bullies even in adulthood. People who speak loudly for the purposes of intimidation or maybe use silence to keep you guessing what they want. Sometimes adult bullies have a considerable amount of control over our very livelihoods. At other times we may not have to see them very often but when we do, we find ourselves flinching at their every word.

Can i leave you with an encouraging word?

Most bullies will only stop bullying you, when you tell them, "Enough is enough!". It may be hard and it may be scary but stand face to face with who ever is trying to bully you and tell them to beat it, your days of being pushed around are over!

That's one thing the Dave Nardi's of the world completely understand.

South of the Border...

2008-07-10T08:53:00.006-06:00

For the second year in a row my wife is going to Mexico... without me. She is also leaving behind the children... now before you start laughing or anything like that just understand i am a big believer in stuff like cake for breakfast.... and lunch.... and dinner. It's a lot easier.

Ruthie and the rest of the team from our church will be helping to build something... last year it was a fire house that several villages in the region of Mexico they went to shared with one another. This year my understanding is that they may be helping to build a school! Very cool!

Now, my wife tells me it is back breaking work... and looking at the pictures she showed me, it looks pretty tough but hey she's a pretty tough chick! Several of the others who will be on this trip with her are veterans of these trips into Mexico while a few are first timers. For the past 11 years we have been sending groups to Mexico... and they have built 27 homes in that time! This group has been working at raising their own funds and attending informational meetings since the beginning of the year... this past Sunday they prepared huge duffel bags of all the things they planned to bring to Mexico and brought them at the church to be weighed (50 pounds is the limit).

Ruthie went last year and grew tired of taking cold showers out in the cow pasture that was home for several days in Mexico and asked for a Sun Shower for Mother's Day.... so that was what she got... Exciting huh?!? Sleeping in a tent on the ground in another country for several days... now that's pretty cool stuff.

It's even all the more amazing to me because i remember quite clearly what my wife's feelings were back before we were married about leaving the United States... let's just say, she wasn't a real "fan" of international travel. But after twenty plus years of hiking all around the US, living in western Canada, spending time while in college in eastern Canada... she does quite well with not being in the US all the time.

Well, i better get going... i am going to need to continue to plan our "real" menu while Ruthie is gone. i mean she made up a menu list for the next several days but i can make pancakes as easily as i can make macaroni and cheese... By the way, is it possible to make cornbread on the grill?

Test driving the "vacated" nest....

2008-06-27T17:06:00.007-06:00

This past week, we have had a taste of life without our "big" boys at home and just our two "little" ones around. i guess you could say a partially vacated (not even "empty) nest experience! i must admit it's a ton quieter and quite a bit less rushed. In many ways it's a bit of a preview to life with a couple of older kids out on their own and a couple of younger ones waiting in the queue for their day to "launch".

This has caused me to think about my older boys quite a bit... they have both been for the most part "lab rats"... sorry there really is no other way to describe them! We have tried a bunch of stuff out on them just to see how they would react or how it would work and i'm happy to report that after all these years and multiple mis-steps, they are still alive!

We think (and i stress think) for the most part they are fairly well adjusted kids... of course, every parent thinks that of their kids right? You know the old... He-seemed-like-such-a normal kid-until.... Our guys love their parents, their grand-parents, their siblings, their church and of course and most importantly their God. They look out for one another (sometimes to a fault), they back one another up and they will blow the whistle on one another (to trustworthy adults) if need be. All this is good, i think... however, i am still amazed that fairly normal children would result from my input (their mother is normal, i on the other hand... well, talk to my wife).

Still, i look forward to their coming home late this week, they will no doubt have very funny and very serious stories to tell about their time away and it will get sort of "nutty" around here all over again but that's okay, not having everyday be "nutty" seemed so far away all those years ago...

Down in a hole...

2008-06-20T10:11:00.008-06:00

Ever been stuck? Stuck not struck... not like the song "Stuck on You" or General Honore's famous stuck on stupid... line in the midst of Hurricane Rita...the stuck i experienced was really sort of funny (in a weird and twisted way)...

Once upon a time i lived in the foothills of the Canadian Rockies and Spelunking or caving out in western Canada is big deal. There were several leaders in my youth ministry who did this and were quite accomplished. i being the dork that i was, agreed to give it a try.

So one sunny day we drove out to mountains, they were (as usual) simply gorgeous. Down we went down into the cave. Damp... cold and musty. I don't know how long we spent crawling through holes in complete darkness with very minimal light... but it seemed like forever. The openings in the rocks tended to be very, very small and honestly i was not. Several of these holes i managed to successfully crawl through on my stomach but several of them required crawling through on your back.

At one point i tried the crawl-on-your-back technique on a particular hole and got stuck.... in a hole, in the ground... in a hole!!!!

And folks... in that hole, it was completely dark especially on my side because i was the last one through! Everyone else was already on other side, seeing my lower torso in the light of multiple flashlights!

The things that run through your mind in a situation like that are pretty horrifying... i wondered if i would ever get free... i recall thinking at the time "great i'm gonna' be stuck here forever!". I also remember wondering how would i ever get unstuck?

Well, obviously it all worked out in the end... somehow in the end, things turned out much better than my overactive imagination allowed for. It took a little work and determination but i would venture to guess that many of you who are reading this, are maybe stuck too but in a different way.

Are you stuck...

in a rough season in your marriage?
with unresolved issues with siblings?
in a pattern of addictive behaviors?
with an anger that boils over at the slightest provocation?
with resentments that you will not let go of?
because someone let you down and forgiveness is not in your vocabulary?

You don't have to be stuck you know.... do like i did.... calm down, stop fighting with yourself and amazing freedom can be yours too.

That's a lot of "Dads"....

2008-06-13T07:25:00.006-06:00

Well... this coming weekend we celebrate Father's Day... even though i have seen 42 of these special days come and go over the years (the last 17 times as an actual Dad myself)... i haven't had the opportunity to tell my own father happy Father's day...

There are perhaps many of you who are in similar situations, for a variety of reasons... that is, you are a dad but haven't really had a dad involved in your life from the time you were very young or perhaps even before you were born (such as was the case in my life). Now you find yourself trying to navigate the sometimes turbulent waters of "fatherhood" with little to no help from the one man who could have (or should have) helped you figure some of that out. Truth is... that's all behind us now.

On the other hand, on this Father's Day there are a quite a few men that i really believe were brought into my life at just the right time, under just the right circumstances who truly shaped me into the person that i have become today... guys like...
Lou- who was the very first man i remember who took care of me and loved me for being me

Uncle Floyd- who is one of the hardest working men i have ever known
Uncle Fred- who is one of the smartest men i have ever known
Uncle E.L. - who is one of the toughest men i have ever known
Uncle Jr. - who is one of the "funnest" (is that a word?) men i have ever known

Coach DaFoe- who helped me see that although i'd never be a great athlete, i could be a great kid...
Coach Wroughton- who saw a crying kid who had great potential, found the key and unlocked my soul
John Pack- who stood for what was right with gentleness and faithfulness
Mr. Ulrich- who encouraged my love for music
Coach Lombardi- who taught me to love the phrase..."No pain...No gain!"

Earl- who modeled a faith in God that changed my life
Sky- who proved that it was possible to really love obnoxious insecure students (like yours truly)!
Coach- who went beyond the call of duty and showed me what it meant to "make it happen"
Allan- For being the best first "boss" a man could have
George- For sowing the seeds of unconditional love into the heart and soul of most incredible woman i know
Ted- for his faithful love for me, even though i know i don't deserve it

So i guess when I really think about it... it's not that i haven't had a dad to thank, i have never thought about thanking all the Dads in my life and so let me say...

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

Dreaming Again?!?

2008-06-08T18:13:00.002-06:00

Sorry i am a bit late with this blog but there is a pretty special reason why...

If you have been a long time (dare i say original) reader of this blog you may recall this Pinch me... i must be dreaming! Hard to believe that was well over a year ago but it was...

There is a great line from a favorite movie of mine (well, the truth is the movie is "okay", the music and the scenery were the killer) called Out of Africa. At one point in the movie one of the characters makes a remark to another character and says... "God is great Saboo, God plays tricks on us..."

But this week after long months of prayer, wise counsel, research and much more prayer, it was announced to our staff and our congregation i have assumed the duties and more officially the title of Executive Pastor (believe me... it sounds more "high and mighty" than it is) here at Westbrook. It's actually a very funny story about how this all came about which perhaps one day in another blog i will share with you all. But suffice it to say i am still amazed at how God's timing works!

The staff here at Westbrook is an incredible group of Christ-followers and leaders in their respective areas of ministry and i am thrilled to have the opportunity to serve them in this capacity... it also an humbling thing to have been asked to serve this church in this capacity.
It's extremely rewarding to be in a place where i absolutely love, getting out of bed every single morning. As to the specifics of the position, in addition to my responsibilities as Pastor of Spiritual Formation, i will take on oversight of several of the church staff and daily operations of the office operations of the church...(and anything else that Mont would like for me to take from "his plate" ;)

Speaking of Mont, here is the bottom line (and i really do mean this part), there is one guy around here who plays an immeasurable part in my love for this place... and that is my Senior Pastor, Mont Mitchell. Don't misunderstand me, he doesn't need me to make him feel extra special, he is truly a very special and godly leader and i am blessed to serve him in this capacity as well.

This has been and continues to be a crazy but thrilling adventure... i can hardly wait to see what He has in store around the corner for all of here at Westbrook!

Things We Never Get To Do...

2008-05-29T08:51:00.003-06:00

Short post today... well my brother and his wife and daughter arrived here yesterday! We are planning on taking a trip into the Chicago this morning and into the early afternoon. It should be a great time!

We are going to head down to Navy Pier and check out the sites in and around the area... it's kind of funny the things you DON'T do when you live in or near large cities like Chicago or New York...

i grew up in New York City and as far as i can remember..

never went to the Empire State building
never went to the Statue of Liberty
never crossed the Brooklyn Bridge
never went to the World Trade Centers
never saw a Broadway musical or play
never went down to the Financial district

but since we moved away and i have started my own family... about every time we get a chance to go back... we DO go to one of these places and enjoy the city....

Where ever you are today get out and enjoy it... you'll be pleasantly surprised, i guarantee it!

Have a great weekend!

Sibling Rivalry?

2008-05-21T14:10:00.009-06:00

My "little" brother Ken and his family are coming to spend the Memorial Day week with us... this will be the first time he has been to our new home near Chicago since we moved back to the area a few years back and the first time our families have been together since we spent a few days at Disneyworld last Spring (my brother works for THE Mouse. i am looking forward to him being here for a number of reasons... most of all because i really like Christy (his wife) and my niece (who calls me "the other" uncle Bobby) Julia is a hoot!

My brother and i are several years apart in age but when we were kids we still spent a ton of time together. Probably the funniest thing i remember about my brother is the fact that as a kid i didn't even know that my mother was pregnant with him until the day she went to the hospital to deliver him! Seriously... i was clueless!

Neither of us had a "dad' in our home growing up and so consequently (even though i didn't realize it at the time) since i was older, i sort of became like a dad... at least for the time i was at home before going off to college. i must admit i was clueless about that too!

i think i can honestly say, i never considered or thought of Ken as a "pest" or as a "hindrance" to my cool-ness factor. He was (and is) my brother and it was simply accepted that if my mom or one of our other aunts or uncles couldn't be around to take care of him... i did.

That's just the way it was.

My mom was real clear about another thing too... she made it real clear that under no circumstances was i to ever lay a finger on my brother! No matter what he said, no matter what he did... i was to never hit him. Truthfully though... i think he had my back on that one most of the time... because i remember there being a couple of times, i clocked him!

i can honestly say that in spite of me, he turned out to be a fairly normal person :) Which just goes to show just what God can do despite what how much we may mess things up!

The right place, at the right time....

2008-05-15T12:52:00.006-06:00

For most of my growing up years i lived in a town called Park Forest, Illinois. In many ways it was an idyllic little suburb to grow up in.

We had a great Park district program, every summer, on the 4th of July you could go to the hill behind Freedom Hall and watch the fireworks. The Aqua Center was where all my friends and i spent every day during the summer trying to impress the girls (and yes once upon a time i went swimming every day, sometimes once in the morning and then again at night)! The "craters" right down the street from my house was a BMX cyclers' dream come true. And of course you could go to the shrine of authentic south suburban pizza by visiting Aurelio's flagship store over in Homewood, it's just THAT good!

My mom never... and i mean NEVER drove me anywhere... if i couldn't get there by walking then it was obviously too far and i really didn't need to go there in the first place!

In the south central area of Cook county with portions of the village in Will county, it in many ways just didn't seem to "fit" this part of Illinois. But since a significant portion of what is now Park Forest was once a stop on the Underground Railroad for runaway slaves in the 19th century perhaps, growing up in that town makes sense after all.

It was here that i had the lesson reinforced that the color of a person's skin did not make them more or less valuable as a human being...
It was here that i had the lesson reinforced that should i never allow anyone or anything else to take my personal dignity away from me....
It was here that i had the lesson reinforced that if i thought i could achieve it, then nothing could stop me except me.
It was a town where whites lived next door to blacks who lived next door to Hispanics who lived next door to Asians who lived next door to people who had no real clue what their ethnicity was... and looking back on it now, i never thought too much about it but the experience of growing up in that town has left an indelible mark on me...

Perhaps that is why i have long sought to be part of another community that creates that same sort of atmosphere... but this time not for me but for my children and my children's children.

And i believe that community is THE church... my prayer is that i can be part of a movement that will see this as part of its' destiny... to truly become a house of prayer for all nations... or more literally all people. It's just who i am.

Dreaming... again?!?

2008-05-15T12:29:00.007-06:00

2008-05-09T06:41:00.004-06:00

For all the things that i did that i shouldn't have done when i was a kid, got caught for and was rightly punished for.... there was this one time i got caught doing something and was going to be punished for it.... only i really didn't do it and only one person believed me... my mom.

And for almost forty years the memory of that days' events is as fresh as ever.

As a kid i attended...(you'll love this..) the Academy of St. Peter Claver in Jamaica, New York. i don't remember a whole lot about that experience except that Milo used to wet his pants at least once a day, Wendy was a naughty girl who picked her noise all day long, my kindergarten Mrs. Hendricks, is still my favorite teacher of all time and like i said my mom believed me one time when no one else did.

Here is the deal, Grover was an older boy who i used to have to hang around with because his mother and my mother were friends and after school while my single parent mom was still at work, Grover's mother Mrs. Fanell, would keep an eye on me until my mom picked me up. i loved when my mom picked me up because the truth is, the only person meaner than Grover... was his mother.

Anyway, Grover and i both were students at St. Peter Claver and one winter morning before school began Grover promised to beat me to a pulp if i didn't go to a little store around the corner from the school with him. Grover knew it was against the rules but did it anyway. Not only that but he proceeded to steal candy while there... i saw him do it. Grover then told me if i told anyone he'd beat me to within an inch of my life (if you haven't figured it out yet... i was pretty sacred of Grover... actually i was pretty scared of everything). Soon enough along with the stolen candy, we went to school.
It didn't take long before i was called down to the principals' office and told that soon my mother would be along to take me home for the day. When i asked why, i was told that the owner of that same small store around the corner had come in and described two little boys who had been in his store earlier that same morning and stolen candy. Uh-oh.... Yes, i had been in the store i confessed (which was against the rules) but as far as stealing candy (definitely against the rules as well)... i didn't know anything about that.... of course Grover was right there the entire time... all he had to do was look at me and i clammed up.

Soon my Mom, who i think at the time was teaching public school for the city of New York (and still does to this day), showed up and wanted to know what had happened. When it was all explained to her, she looked at me and asked... Bobby (that's what i used to be called before i grew older and became much more sophisticated)... Bobby, she asked, did you steal candy from the candy store? i knew this was beyond serious, as the principal, the store owner and Grover looked on... my answer was "No mommy, i didn't steal any candy".

The store owner couldn't believe it! He had seen me in the store, he had seen little hands take candy without paying for it, of course i had stolen it, the principal (who knew that Grover was a bad kid and a bad influence on other kids) couldn't believe it either... why in the world was my mother asking me if i had stolen any candy?!?
But for my mother the issue was settled, she was not about to force a confession out of me... and i will never forget what she said that day in that little principals' office... even as other adults looked on and expressed disbelief in my truthfulness, my mother said... If he says he didn't steal it, I believe him... he never lies to me.

Now my friends, that is the kind of thing that makes you never ever want to lie to your Mom again! Did i never shade or stretch the truth the rest of the time i was at home... no, i did a fair amount of fibbing in my time but having a Mom who believed me and in me at a time when no one else did... well let's just say the experience stays with me to this day.

For that and so many other things i say thank you so very much Mom and Happy Mother's Day!

NO ICE CREAM!

2008-05-02T11:09:00.007-06:00

You know... i really love hangin' out with people that i love... take for instance the staff of the church where i serve... several of us had the chance to spend last week in Orlando, Florida at a conference. The conference was called Exponential... it was all about planting or starting (and in some cases re-starting) new churches.

The speakers were top-notch, the music was powerful, the workshop we led together was a blast and the time away with my partners... well let's just say they had a great time at my expense :)

Ever been to Midway Airport... or any airport for that matter? If your answer is yes... then you know that to buy a 1/4 pound bag of pecans can run you about $12.56.

Anyway, after our group of six guys arrived and had a quick bit to eat in the little food court... i happened to notice the Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream about the same time that Pastor Amado mentioned that he was still hungry and could go for some dessert. Now if you know me one of my biggest weaknesses is ice cream and Ben & Jerry's is about as good as ice cream can get... relatively speaking. The thing that jumped out to me was the price for a single scoop of ice cream in a waffle cone at this Ben & Jerry's... $7.95!!??!!
I then proceeded to let the group know how stupid a person would have to be to buy a scoop of ice cream for almost eight dollars!

That was a mistake.

For the remainder of our time away, i was essentially known as the ice cream nazi...

Everyone in our group took great pleasure of mocking me because i wouldn't let them buy ice cream.

Whenever they had the chance, my cohorts would take the opportunity to make reference to my "Grinch" like manner when it came to ice cream... to the point where someone in our group lied to our server in a restaurant behind my back (actually to my face... i just wasn't paying attention) about it being my birthday and asking the wait staff to sing some fake Happy Birthday song and bring a scoop of ice cream to me*.... it was actually pretty funny when some complete stranger who happened to be in the restaurant at the same time, then stood up and sang the real Happy Birthday... especially since my birthday is really in January!

The funny thing is, i don't think there is another group of guys i'd rather be with than those guys last week and even though they mocked me relentlessly... it was actually pretty funny.

*The server totally misunderstood and brought a chocolate muffin with a single lit candle instead... it took some of the edge off of the joke at that point.

Road Trip!!!

2008-04-17T16:36:00.003-06:00

Perhaps you have never heard of Exponential?

It promises to be an incredible event taking place next week in Orlando, Florida. The speaking line up will include people like Rick Warren, Andy Stanley, Alan Hirsch and Dave Ferguson. Other special guest will include Dr. George Yancey, Mark DeYmaz and this guy i know named Mont Mitchell.

Well over 2,000 people (including several from our church staff) will gather for four days to dream, envision and to prepare themselves and their teams to engage in the most significant task in human history.... planting and nurturing new churches. If you don't think this is critical work, think again. This is not just about new churches in the United States but around the world!

Some of you might be thinking, why do we need new churches... don't we have enough already ?!? The answer to that is simply... No. There are so many people around the world, we are no where close to having enough churches currently in existence to impact their lives!

i am particularly excited about this year's conference because there is a track designed especially for those who are interested in multi-ethnic/ multi-racial church planting. i am absolutely convinced that the future of the church will need to focus on creating communities of faith that celebrate and embrace racial and ethnic diversity. The material that will be presented in this track will challenge and encourage... and i can't wait!

As a result of not being in town next week my next blog entry will be May 1st.... between now and the next time i visit this blog again, i plan on "suffering" through 87 degree weather with partially sunny to sunny skies... someone has to do it... i am glad to volunteer!

Doing Life....Together!

2008-04-10T14:18:00.005-06:00

It has taken almost 15 years but i have to admit it feels really good.... it feels great to be part of a small circle of people who are loving, safe, accepting and ready (if necessary) to get in my face ...

We get together every other week and when we do, i absolutely love it! Our group has been together now for several months and it's been very cool watching how all us interact with one another. Our children love being with one another when they have a chance to come together as a matter of fact have asked that we all spend more time together.

i can admit it now, i know i need community. i need a place where i can go and don't have to be "on"... i don't have to be the "Answer man"... no, in this group, we get to be just small group participants. Let me give you an example...

After a great but grueling weekend at Westbrook, my group simply gave me a break by letting me be me. i simply came to the group on that night and was able to soak up the comfort of the group... like a warm, rugged Carhartt jacket, my group became a place to be recharged and energized for the coming week!

On one level i knew i really missed this kind of community... i mean, that is what i am always encouraging others to do... connect in community... what i didn't realize was just how much it meant to me!

Do you have a small group that you're part of? A group of people that you "do life" with every week? If you don't, seriously consider making a small group experience part of your life... trust me, once you find the right group of people to connect with, you can never be the same... and that's a very good thing!

An Awesome Growth Weekend!

2008-04-04T19:36:00.009-06:00

This weekend we are having one of the best teachers of the New Testament in the United States, perhaps the world with us all weekend. He will teach in depth sessions for our church on Friday night and on Saturday on 1st century wisdom for 21st century living... which will be a study on the letters that the apostle Paul wrote in the New Testament. Dr. Mark Scott is academic dean of Ozark Christian College where he has served since 1983. We are thrilled to have him with us!
He will preach for all of our Sunday services this weekend as well! That will be a treat!

Perhaps the best thing about these in depth teaching sessions that we sponsor as a church is that it gives our people who really want to be challenged in their faith walk a great chance to grow in the depth of their knowledge, to move to another level or tier in this thing called the Christian life... thus we call call these events Christian Life Development: Tier 2.

As i listen to him teach at this moment, i think how awesome it is to be at a great church like Westbrook... this is what it means to grow! i love it!

How NOT to Talk About Racial Issues in the U.S. 101

2008-03-27T08:34:00.004-06:00

Hmmmm, interestingly enough not many of you had much to say last week about the current political season we are in the midst of here in our nation....
Well maybe you had some thoughts about it but didn't feel strongly enough about to write anything for posterity's sake...
i understand... i am quite tired of all the "noise" as well.... why add more to it right?

Except.... i have to say, that the more i hear said about the current state of "race relations" in our nation i find myself fluctuating between a couple extremes.

On the one hand depending on who you listen to, we are "so close" to being over race... and on the other hand things have never been worse because people have never been more oblivious to the disparities between people of varying ethnic and racial backgrounds.

It's weird, it's frustrating, it's disturbing, it's disappointing... it's making me crazy listening to a bunch of people who can't seem to agree on whether or not having a free trade policy is the right or best thing for our nation try to tackle something as delicate and deeply problematic from a historical sense as the issue of race.

There is one part of me that wishes everybody would get as honest as i think a couple of people who have had a few portions of their "sermons" played repeatedly on the radio, T.V. and the Internet. At least then perhaps we'd know where everybody really stood and could stop the silly posturing.

i know that may sound odd but the fact is, when we have a majority of people indicating they don't really have a problem with the issue of race, then have to live through the last couple of weeks, it seems we do have a problem and a pretty big one at that!
Let's just admit it, go from there and work it out.

Strange, the last thing anyone wants to be accused of is being prejudice or having "racist" thoughts or feelings... it's really weird how adverse we seem to admitting our human-ness in this aspect of life. Is it a thing good to dislike people simply based on ethnicity or racial background... obviously not. But a bigger problem, is to be shamed into NOT talking about your honest feelings because it just really shows how big a jerk you really are.
Hello!?! Welcome to the club.... we're all jerks!

Anyway, the talk about race over the last few weeks has been disappointing, not because we are having the talk but rather because it seems to be more about people making statements with little to no difference making discussion... at all. What do you think?

His Pastor Said *&%$# ?!?

2008-03-20T15:22:00.021-06:00

First off, if you came here looking for a take on a particular pastor in the national news... i think i may disappoint you in that regard but while i have you here anyway let me ask....

Is anyone else out there a bit disappointed? Maybe it's just me but i must admit this political season has uncovered what i think are some pretty serious problems that our nation still hasn't dealt with properly.

i have heard several pundits, talking heads or whatever they are called this week mockingly wonder aloud if once one of the leading presidential contenders is elected will our nation no longer have a problem with racism!?! That is the wrong question to ask because it presupposes (i think) that somehow the ultimate "price" will have been paid, the final "debt" retired and all the chronic voices that cry racism will have to be stilled... for "Behold... you have one of your own occupying not only the highest office in the land but in the world.... NOW can you please give it a rest?!?"

It's sad, because we can never seem to really say the hard things to each other, because quite frankly it seems no one trust each other.
i mean when it gets right down to it, that is what it's all about isn't? Saying hard things doesn't have to be about treating one another with little to no respect... or about trying to play an endless game of one upmanship. In fact saying hard things to each other should be about desiring what is authentically best for one another.
But somewhere along the line it seems that the cynicism, bitterness and anger simply rule the majority of conversations that we might have with one another about the things that really matter in our nation. Does that make sense?
Just one political season in my lifetime would i love to see the poison, vindictive, incendiary stuff be completely and authentically off limits. Let's argue or discuss the issues in way that is definitive but constructive and not destructive.

Perhaps it makes for great election season "real life" drama that helps sell newspapers, magazines or whatever... maybe it drives internet traffic to the sites that contain the latest juicy news on what "he said" and "she said". It might even make very, very dangerous and complex issues seem like no-brainers.

But the one thing is doesn't do, is make us as a people... look so smart. And that is a major disappointment.

Amazingly Strange...

2008-03-13T19:41:00.005-06:00

This week, one of my sons is in Haiti helping to build a medical clinic and a school. He got a last minute invitation to join a team of people heading there last week, when another person was denied medical clearance by a physician. The trip was all paid for, his passport was up to date and his grandparents were leading the team.... how could you say anything but "Sure... i guess!?!"

i got to thinking about this kid and his willingness to go, and to help at the drop of a hat and wondered... "Is this the son that i helped raised?!?" He along with his siblings really do love to serve... they complain sometimes but for the most part they love to help people. i continue to be humbled by this when i see it. And to be a bit honest it scares me a little bit because i know both of my boys are headed in the we'll-do-whatever-go-whereever-no-matter-what-the-personal-cost... i say that not because i am this dad sticking out his chest... but because it is humbling to realize... it seems my guys get it.

It's what every parent really hopes will happen and wants to happen, then what do you do when it does happen?

i spend most of my time trying not to think about just what these guys are headed into.... my oldest is going to end up making a difference in an urban center somewhere in this country loving on people that would be called ..."the least of these". My other son is going to end up half way around the globe in some country where they don't have near the standard of living we do here in the United States, loving and serving people who have very little in the way of material possessions but more love than can be imagined!

The strangest part in all this is that Ruthie and i would readily admit in a way we didn't see this coming... but it's pretty cool to watch these boys becoming men who are learning to love and live with their hearts on their sleeves.

And while it's also a bit scary (especially for me... i am the worrier), we can't think of a more incredible blessing.

Gotta' Love Your Leaders!

2008-03-04T13:59:00.007-06:00

Please forgive me for not getting this done last week but we were busy planning an event that turned out to be simply fantastic! And to be honest i really didn't have time to do this today but i just had to get a word in here about an event from this past week!

Foe the past several months we have been planning and prepping for making what we do at much more Simple. With that in mind we made plans to clear the calendar and focus our collective attention as a staff on a church wide training event called Leadership Community.
It was a fantastic event! From all the volunteers to help the event come together so smoothly, to all the staff and leaders who prepared to lead various training sessions, to the incredible participation by a cross section of leaders in our church it was simply awesome!

The secret to the success of this event was work that Mary, our director of Early Childhood Education put into this event! She is incredibly organized and does a great job making sure that all the necessary "ducks" are lined up in a row!

Our next event is slated for August of this year and i am already excited about it! We are in need of the next generation of leaders around here at Westbrook and this event will play a significant role in helping us get to that next level of church wide leadership! Way to go Westbrook!

The Church of Me!

2008-02-22T13:57:00.004-06:00

This week i had the chance to go to an event called "Doing Church in the 'Burbs". One of the main speakers was Randy Frazee. Randy is currently a teaching pastor at Willowcreek but will soon make a transition to Senior Pastor of Oak Hills Church in San Antonia, TX. Randy is also the author of several books but one i enjoyed immensely is The Connecting Church. Randy spoke of the rampant individualism in our nation and the damage that it is wreaking. Good stuff, excellent food for thought!

Another speaker Ed Bahler, president of the Aspen Group, spoke about the challenges of living in and being the church in theDigital age. He showed a video which i have to admit while pretty funny was pretty sobering... i'd love to get your thoughts as well... Enjoy!

Something to talk about?!?

2008-02-14T15:26:00.008-06:00

Now understand i mean no disrespect but i suspect this is an issue that needs to really be discussed a whole lot more!

i got an email from a friend a few days ago wondering about an issue that is near and dear to the hearts of many folks here in the States. Those who have been and continue to go to the polls to vote in Primaries and will eventually be voting in the upcoming general elections are probably going to need to settle this issue once and for all... here is the gist of what my friend asked...
" The whole idea that the American health care is run by insurance companies seems so bizarre. They are there to make a profit... how could that possible be beneficial to the people? And what if you can't afford it, are you just out of luck? To hear that people have to mortgage their house to pay for health issues seems crazy to me...."

Here is my response....
You wrote that you can't imagine having to "... pay for surgery"

[Dude], you have got to be kidding me?

Do we pay for groceries (btw gotta' have them...)?
Do we pay for clothes (again, gotta' have them...)?
Do we pay for a place to live (hmmm, gotta have them too)?

Why or from where do we get the idea that health care should be underwritten or "free" (and trust me, there is never anything free especially within a capitalist economic system or even in a socialist system... look at the condition of the countries behind the Iron Curtain at the end of the Cold War... somebody is ALWAYS paying for whatever commodities or goods are up on the auction block)?

Now, should it cost exorbitant amounts of money to have surgery? I don't think it should, but we usually don't concern ourselves too much for paying top dollar for great food, clothes or a house... right?!? But for some still unexplained reason we believe that health care should be underwritten in a way these other things aren't.... I just want to know WHY?

And one other thing to consider is this...isn't one of the main points of capitalism to turn a profit? I am not sure that govt should be in the business of deciding which businesses are going to be turning a profit and which ones won't be or shouldn't be!

No matter what that businesses goods are... perhaps the reasons for cost prohibitive health care are a bit more complex than the bad ole' insurance companies being heartless and only concerned about keeping cost down by denying Aunt Millie her heart transplant and more about the intense govt. regulation and badly needed torte reform here in our nation etc, etc.

Anyway, I am probably way out of my league on this subject...

What do you think? i'd love to hear about it...

Going To The Next Level....

2008-02-05T16:22:00.000-06:00

Ever been to Savannah?
That's where i was last week and didn't get a chance to post to my blog...

Savannah is a nice town and this is a great time of year to visit... the weather was great and so was the event that i got to be a part of... The Next Level Leadership Conference was hosted by Savannah Christian Church. The main speakers were Sr. Pastor Cam Huxford and Gene Appel from Willow Creek Community Church.

Savannah Christian is a fantastic story... the staff and volunteers were absolutely incredible! The church has been around for quite a few years but in the last several years the church has experienced significant growth. They are located in a growing area of Savannah with tremendous potential for even further growth.

Having attended several events like this in the past it's quite easy to have fairly low expectations but the team of speakers, workshop leaders and host did a incredible job with this event. From the moment you arrived on the church campus, their gracious hospitality made all the difference!

There were three events that really impacted me in a significant manner...

First, Gene Appel took time to unpack the issue of leading a church through significant change without doing what so often happens in those instances... killing it! For me among the most significant topic Gene addressed in this regard was the topic of The 4 C's of the Channel of Change, 1) Conflict 2) Confusion 3) Comparison and finally 4) Crisis.

Secondly, i had an opportunity to sit and talk a bit with Savannah's Executive Pastor Harvey Bream, his responsibilities include but are not limited to oversight of all the staff, finances and strategic planning for the church.
1) His advice to me was to be aware that in transitioning to a position similar to his, it might be easy for people to view me differently... to become known as the "No" man.
2) He also said it is important to know that the person you as Executive Pastor answer to (the Senior Pastor) is "emotionally strong".
3) Finally Harvey recommended that the it is critical to create an atmosphere where it is truly safe to hold everyone accountable.

The last session i sat in on was on Determining Your Church's Future. In this session Harvey Bream walked everyone through the 5 year strategic plan that the leadership, staff and congregation had put together that they believe will guide them through 2012. He spoke of and explained it's simplicity. The church has chosen to focus on three strategic areas:
1) Our People (the congregation)
2) Our Community(which as i mentioned earlier is thriving)
3) Our World (the church has a heart for world wide missions)

It was truly encouraging and if i make everyone around here crazy enough perhaps next year it will be an event that several of us can travel to as a team....

Ahhh i can see it now.... we're all at the Crab Shack see and...

Walking down memory lane....

2008-01-24T10:21:00.000-06:00

Once upon a time, i lived in Canada...

There were so many things i loved about where i lived... in the foothills of the eastern slopes of the Rocky Mountains. Kind of hard to believe that a kid born in mid-town Manhattan, raised in Queens and the south suburbs of Chicago could end up in in one of if not the most gorgeous part of North America!

i learned all about curling and hockey (which is by far the biggest sport in all of Canada far and away!). i learned to love the world's largest outdoor rodeo...The Calgary Stampede! The chuckwagon races were the best as far as i was concerned. Stampede week was always a great week in town because everywhere all over town you could get a free all you can eat pancake breakfast with all the fixin's! And let me tell ya' the Chinese food in Calgary blows away the Chinese food we eat here in the States.... i also learned the hard way that although we speak english here in the US that the english of your average Canadian is a tad different... for example at one of my very first public events (a dinner to say "Welcome to the staff!"), i referred to a serviette as a napkin a rather funny but serious faux paux. Amidst all the giggling, snickering and laughing i learned that in Canada, no one in their right state of mind would use a napkin at the dinner table. When i wondered aloud "Why not?". i was informed that in Canada only women use napkins. If ever a black man could turn red from embarrassment, i am sure i did that night!

One of the things i treasured about my time in Canada was all of the people that came into our lives! It is kind of amazing that these people took a chance and let me have an influence on the lives of their kids as Pastor of Student ministries. It was great experiment and i will always be grateful to my first Sr. Pastor... who decided to think "outside of the box" and bring a black guy onto his all white staff! The thing about it is, our time in Canada probably changed us more than it did all the students and parents we came to know and love.

These days i am finding out about many of the students that we left all those years ago back in Alberta... many of them no more than eight or nine years old when we left have turned into incredible young parents, beautiful young ladies (inside and outside), handsome young men, and dedicated Christ-followers. At least one of them has been blessed to become one of the biggest country music stars in all of Canada!

Others have had to deal with bad health, tough and difficult marriages that didn't turn out so well, friendships that faltered over time, some of them have for various reasons have "wandered away from the faith..."

The bottom line is that at some level they will always be "our kids"... no matter what! i keep track of them even if from a distance. They are an incredible group of young people who are making an impact on the world and i love to hear about what they are doing. i can't help but feel a bit responsible for the difference they are making right where they are!

Realizing the dream...

2008-01-18T15:00:00.000-06:00

There are quite a few reasons i look forward to the month of January... this month we celebrate my "little" brother's birthday, it is when we celebrate our wedding anniversary (as i wrote about last week ), we also celebrate my little girl's birthday... AND it also the month of my birthday as well!
My birthday this year was especially cool because after searching (and complaining about it) for at least 10 years... this year, "Henry V" was among my gifts (way to go Ruthie!)! What a fantastic film! This movie has it all... war, romance, intrigue, treachery, honor and a great musical score! Gotta love it!

But for me the main reason i look forward to this month is not just because of my birthday but because of who i share a birthday with...

It was this man who for me, from a very early age has been and continues to be a hero. i can remember when my mother told me that i was going to give a speech about him at church (Notice: my mom didn't ask me if i wanted to.... she simply informed me that it was going to happen!) .... True Vine of Holiness Missionary Baptist Church. i didn't really mind the subject matter but wasn't too thrilled about the speech part! The fact is, that event is one of my earliest memories of standing in front of people and trying to share something that i thought they should know about!

At no more than eight or nine years old, i believe i pretty much mumbled my way through his story. It was a story that i thought people probably already knew about but perhaps they didn't....

Born in January 1929, this man grew up in the home of a preacher to ultimately become a preacher himself. Because he skipped both the ninth and twelfth grades he entered college at 15 years old! After graduating with a bachelor's degree in 1948 he continued his education, ultimately earning his doctorate degree at the age of 26 years old. But even with all of his brilliance, this man lived in a nation and at a time when people like him were mistreated, denied basic human rights... to the point of being killed simply because of their skin color. His place in history was secured when he helped to lead a boycott in Montgomery, Alabama. The successful 381 day boycott of a bus service that forced people of color to give up their seats and move to the back of the bus for Whites catapulted him to national prominence... this drum major for justice and righteousness challenged the consciousness of our nation in a way that probably no one has since his death from an assassin's bullet in April 1968.

i have always been proud to say that i share a birthday with Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

i am a beneficiary of his and many, many other's efforts to make his dream of a nation that judges people not on the basis of their skin color but rather on the content of their character.... become a reality.

It his legacy that i remember every single January 15th... a legacy that makes it possible for men and women who look a lot like me to secure the unalienable rights of our citizenship here in the United States of America.

Amazing... Simply Amazing!

2008-01-10T21:59:00.000-06:00

January 1985....
On a brisk winter night Darren and i meandered across a dark campus in Lincoln, Illinois... we are transfer students and are trying to get acclimated to our new school after a "difficult"
semester at another college. It just so happens that night, a womens' basketball game is taking place in what this place calls a "gym". Partially to get out of the cold and partially to see if there are really any other people on this college campus, we make our way in. Once inside we stand in the middle of two sets of bleachers (if you can call them that) to our left and to our right.

Because the gym is so small, bleachers only fit on one side of the gym... the side we entered from. We never really planned on staying long but just before we turn to go, looking to my right, i notice one of the Lady Angels (that is what our women's athletic teams are nicknamed) dribbling the basketball up the floor going from right to left... and the fact is, she is absolutely one of the cutest girls i think I have ever seen... as i watch her help the team set up its' offense, i with intention, turn to my friend and say...."Darren within one year, i am going to take that girl... the one dribbling the ball, yeah her.... out on a date!"

Amazingly enough, i didn't even know her name!?!

January 1986...
Ruthie and i go out on our very first date.... We eat dinner at "The Depot" and since i'd never seen the original 101 Dalmatians (which coincidentally was celebrating that very month, its' 25 year anniversary of being released to the public by Walt Disney) we take that in as well. The food and the movie were exceptional but the amazing part of the evening was simply... Ruthie.
i knew i was done... she was the one.

January 1988
Because of the crazy rules (that i'll maybe explain another time and that have since been changed) Ruthie and i are married not just once but twice. In a ceremony at my home church in the south suburbs of Chicago witnessed by lots of friends and family and another ceremony that had to happen before midnight witnessed by her mom and dad and maternal grandparents in the living room of her dad and mom's church parsonage in Indiana... we become husband and wife. In a few days we begin our amazing journey together to Canada and an amazing journey together in life.

January 2008
This month marks our being married for 20 years!
Why she puts up with me, i do not know... but this one thing i do know...
She is still the cutest girl i have ever seen... God has blessed me way beyond anything i deserve and she is amazing.... simply amazing!

Another year... make it a great one!

2008-01-02T21:03:00.000-06:00

What is in your New Year?

For me, i resolve that i will turn my own personal "volume"down a bit... i will seek to be less hyper reactionary. For those of you who don't know me, i have a tendency to engage in what i have come to label as catastrophic thinking....

Let me explain...

For the most part i am a "the-glass-is-half-full" thinker. It takes a lot of conscientious thinking on my part to maintain that sort of outlook but since i try to stay pretty aware that it is always easier to spend most of my time being pessimistic... i over compensate in this area of my life.

Now here is the bad part, when in certain situations it becomes obvious that "things" are breaking bad... i can easily (and quickly) go from "the-glass-is-half-full" to "the-glass-is-definitely-half-empty-and-the-half-that-is-left-is-Ricin!" That is what i have come to call "catastrophic" thinking... thinking the absolute worst possible outcome regarding whatever situation.... That needs to change this year.

Secondly, i also resolve to return to the weight i was at the end of my high school days... plus five pounds... that should put me at about 180 lbs. And let me tell ya', i have got a looooooong way to go...
The other day i was at a local department store looking at my four year old son playing in the area between the exterior doors and the interior doors and the thought occurred to me (for the billionth time lately)..."Daniels... if you want to see his children you have to get all over your health and stay all over it"...

Can i tell you what is the scariest part about making these resolutions? Typically i would tell my wife Ruthie, perhaps someone else that i trust as well... which is good accountability but fairly low impact... now YOU all know...

What was i thinking?!?

Tradition can be a very good word....

2007-12-21T14:17:00.000-06:00

I don't know how many of you have Family traditions, (my suspicion is that most of you do) but if not you should work extra hard to establish a few! Traditions can become powerful statements about what is important and what matters most!
Recently Ruthie (my wife) was explaining to a co-worker one of our Christmas traditions. Every Christmas we purchase a movie or one of the classic Christmas specials to watch as a family. On Christmas eve our family gathers together to watch the video but not before our children check out what is in their Christmas stockings (which this year for the first time in a long time, we did not have the chance to hang above a fireplace BUT we did get to hang them up together as a family all under one roof... for more on that, read my earliest blogs!). Also on Christmas eve our kids for the past ten to twelve years have received new Christmas pajamas. As they dig into their stockings and put on their new jammies, we sit down to watch a movie and drink Hot Chocolate!
After Ruthie explained this Daniels tradition to her co-worker they remarked..."Really?!? Our family should do something like that!"

And so I am writing to you to say.... Yes... if you don't have anything like that you are doing as a family... it's still not too late, Christmas eve and Christmas day are a few days off... come up with some simple tradition that will help your family to remember what matters most.

Have a great Christmas and a safe New Year!

A memorable Christmas season...

2007-12-06T11:26:00.001-06:00

i grew up in a home with a single mom and remember always having a blast at Christmas! i am fairly confident that my mom didn't make a ton of money but i remember getting toys that i probably did not deserve. In addition one of my most powerful memories was getting to go to Radio City Music hall in Manhattan to see the annual Christmas show and the Rockettes. There was nothing like watching all the singers, dancers and then finally the big guy himself Santa, up on the stage welcoming Christmas to New York City!

When i was a kid we had the world's coolest (at least i thought so) artificial Christmas tree. Most people would say that the tree was ugly, hideous and tacky but to me it embodied what this time of the year was all about! As a matter of fact these Aluminum trees are enjoying a bit of a renaissance.... you gotta' love that!

Anyway we went out a few days ago actually the weekend of Thanksgiving and got our Christmas tree. We called around a few places and found out that we were a long way away from the days of our first Christmas tree purchase the very first year of our marriage... when we brought a six foot Canadian Douglas fir home for $2.50!
That right two dollars and fifty cents! But in this area that same tree could cost anywhere from $40 to $60! So we packed the family in the van, stopped at one of our favorite coffee shops to get drinks for everyone and drove out west for about 45 minutes. We cut our own tree down, had it shaken and baled for a grand total of $30... not cheap but a lot less that we first thought we might end up paying, there not too much funnier than a family of six trying to decide which tree looks the most Christmas-y! Especially when the youngest member of the family insist on whacking everyone with broken tree branches insisting that he's got a light-saber in his hands!

The live tree is one of a total of four scattered throughout the house. i will say this the tree looks great in the house. Not quite as nostalgic as the aluminum tree i remember but close!

PS. Enjoy the following link.... Holiday Fun!

Consider the times...

2007-11-29T09:03:00.000-06:00

Can i ask a question....

What do the following characteristics remind you of…

Tolerating all religious beliefs, philosophical teachings, and government systems made ultimately compatible, or a reflection of, a larger system…

An obvious disparity between rich and poor....

A government that requires heavy taxation of its people…

Women being considered second-class citizens…

A culture very interested in the supernatural…

A culture thriving on syncretism – seeking to have all people maintain their own traditions and philosophies, and yet seeing them all under a general governing perspective…

If you were thinking of our nation, the United States... you would be incorrect. The above characteristics marked the 1st century world of the Roman empire.
It is this world that Jesus was born into... and it was perfect timing....

But when the fullness of the time was come,
God sent forth his Son, made of a woman (Gal 4:4 KJV)

There is much to be learned from the 1st century world that Jesus was born into... it would seem that for all of our technological achievements and sophistication in this current century... the more things have changed the more they have stayed the same.
Perhaps that is part of the reason this simple story of a babe in a stable feeding trough (manger) wrapped in rags (swaddling clothes) still inspires awe over 2000 years later... I love that!

I'm Thinking of...

2007-11-22T08:42:00.000-06:00

....an incredible wife...
....four great kids that are amazing and continue to amaze
....a staff that are I call friends
....a church that truly loves all people
....in-laws that love the church
....people that live in places like Edmonton, Indianapolis, Lincoln, Avon, Noblesville, Cromwell, Calgary, Love's Park, and all over Chicagoland
....freedom in this life and in the life to come
....an opportunity to make history
....a warm bed to lay down in at night
....the ability to watch the snow that is falling outside my door
....the food that currently sits in my refrigerator
....great books
....the right to teach our children in our home
....a nation that is a great idea come to life
....my failures and my successes
....forgiveness for my deepest faults
....this quiet moment

and my challenge is to never take any of this for granted and to strive instead for an attitude thankfulness every single day!

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Do You Feel Old?!?

2007-11-07T13:57:00.000-06:00

Serving as a pastor for now about twenty years, it was bad enough when the kids from my first ministry in Calgary, Alberta started having their own children... but now comes another blow...

... this past week my oldest son went and took his driving test for the state of Illinois and passed.

There it is... another official notch in the proverbial "you're an old dude" gun!
It's not all that bad though... I mean the fact is, his Mom is technically even older than me (Don't worry, she never reads my blog... just sort of nods when I tell her about it and says "Uh-huh...")!

It was almost like an out of body experience watching him back the car out of the garage without his mom, another adult or me riding "shot-gun" as it were. He still has a lot of learning to do in my book and the state has the audacity to tell him he is ready to drive our family vehicle without his mom or me in the car with him? Who do they think they are?!?

He looked so.... "independent".

Does that make sense?

It was almost like he didn't need his mom or dad for anything at that point. I mean, I know that's not completely true but the driver's license thing is a significant rite of passage to adulthood in our culture. This is one of those critical points at which what we have invested in our children as they have been and continue to grow into adulthood pretty much shows up.

I'll tell you this much... my son is blessed to have his Mom as his mom because every fiber in my body screamed not to let him even begin learning how to drive... oh it's not that I don't trust him, because I trust him implicitly. I am just not sure about the other 17 year olds out there on the roads.

The upside to all of this however is that having another driver in the family has been helpful... the next hurdle however is on the horizon and getting ever closer (*gulp*)... college.

Man, I'm old.

Does It Ever Stop?!?

2007-10-25T14:02:00.000-06:00

DNA Discoverer: Blacks Less Intelligent Than Whites
Paul Wagenseil, FoxNews Thursday, October 18, 2007

James D. Watson, 79, co-discoverer of the DNA helix and winner of the 1962 Nobel Prize in medicine, He recognized that the prevailing belief was that all human groups are equal, but that "people who have to deal with black employees find this not true."

Acknowledging that the issue was a "hot potato," the lifelong Democrat and avowed secular humanist nonetheless said his beliefs were not an excuse to discriminate against blacks.

"There are many people of color who are very talented," said Watson, "but don't promote them when they haven't succeeded at the lower level."

He told the interviewer, a former student of his, that he had recently inaugurated a DNA learning center near Harlem, and would like to have more black researchers at his lab, "but there's no one to recruit."

Uh... maybe it's just me but I think the next article seems to make complete sense in terms of sequence...

Controversial DNA scientist retires
MALCOLM RITTER, AP Science Writer Thu Oct 25, 11:45 AM ET

James Watson, famous for DNA research but widely condemned for recent comments about intelligence levels among blacks, retired Thursday from his post at a prestigious research institution.

Watson shared a Nobel Prize with Francis Crick and Maurice Wilkins in 1962 for co-discovering the structure of the DNA molecule. He is one of America's most prominent scientists.

In his statement Thursday, Watson said that because of his age, his retirement was "more than overdue. The circumstances in which this transfer is occurring, however, are not those which I could ever have anticipated or desired."

…. A profile quoted him as saying that he's "inherently gloomy about the prospect of Africa" because "all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours — whereas all the testing says not really."

Excuse me... but I must admit that I for one, am not disappointed that such a "brilliant" man as Dr. Watson is obviously shown to be not so "brilliant" after all.

Is this what happens when you begin to drink your own intellectual "Kool-Aid"?

This is the sort of thing that never ceases to catch me off-guard... perhaps I should be more cynical but I am not... so when a "scientist" jumps out of his lab with "ground-breaking" news like this I don't know about anybody else but it's more than hurtful, it makes me angry.

Nothing like having your kids hear about how they are "intellectually inferior" or how they can't/won't succeed at a "lower level" (whatever that means).

Anyway, any thoughts are welcome... you can post them right to my blog for everyone to read, that would be awesome!

Simple is in...

2007-10-18T14:31:00.000-06:00

After a very long and arduous month of ministry activity our church staff had the opportunity to get together for a staff retreat and before I write anything else let me be clear... there is no other group of people I'd rather serve with than the church ministry staff that I serve with right now! I love you guys very much... despite the fact that a couple of you (and you know who you are) continue to deny me my rightful 1st place prizes year after year at our staff retreats... but I'm not bitter...

At any rate we went to a great spot that was graciously made available to all 12 of us for a couple of days (thanks Mr. & Mrs. D...)! While were there, we as a staff had the opportunity to tackle the issue of "complexity" in our current ministry. It was absolutely refreshing!

The challenge laid out for us was to think about how we might simplify our ministries. We were not looking just for the sake of doing less but in fact accomplishing more! I know, it doesn't seem to make sense but using several principles advanced in Rainer & Geiger's, "Simple Church" we began the process of considering the issue of whether or not we've begun to over program ourselves and are on our way to becoming just another "cluttered" church!

"To know Christ fully and make Him known..." along with what is referred to as our "simple six" is to be our focus. The next several weeks as we continue to work on simplifying should be a blast! I'll keep you posted on our progress!

The Most Segregated Hour of The Week.... Sunday Mornings@ 10AM

2007-10-05T13:55:00.000-06:00

The last few weeks have absolutely flown by as we have launched back into a very busy season of the year here in Chicagoland!

Probably the most one of the most exciting things that has happened in the last two weeks was a recent weekend seminar called "CLD: Tier 2" led by sociologist and author Dr. George Yancey! As a part of our continuing look at what it means to be a "Kingdom Citizen" here at Westbrook, Dr. Yancey spent time with us discussing "The Multi-Racial Church & Kingdom Citizenship".

Using his newest book Beyond Racial Gridlock as a starting point of sorts we spent Friday evening taking a look at:
1) How We Got to Where We Are (in terms of racism) &
Secular Approaches to Racism

On Saturday morning we examined:
1) A Biblical Response to Racism

It was an eye opening experience and a great challenge to us all! One of the most intriguing things that Dr. Yancey shared with us is the powerful catalytic, pace setting example that the church in the United States could set for the rest of our society if Christ-followers would truly commit to creating multi-racial and multi-ethnic churches all around our nation!

We hope to have him back in our area soon perhaps as part of a regional Mosaix conference within the next several months!

If you are interested in finding out more about our recent event here at Westbrook, drop me a line and I'd be glad to share more with you about this fantastic Tier 2 event!